wats wrong with her???

My dad left home 28 years ago without a word leaving us to fend for ourselves. We almost go homeless and there were several occasions we went without food.

I have got not much memories of him. I only know of his existence. He does come back once in a orange moon to collect his letters.

Today, he came back to stay with us. Which nobody looks forward to. My mom have the intention to divorce and pay him a sum of money so that he can no longer disrupt our lives. I strongly objected on it because I feel that we have no responsibility towards him. My resentment towards him is strong.

The day he came back, he was looking down and out. My anger receded. My mom was grouchy towards him all the time till he conveyed that this is only temporary.

He must really had a rough time outside. I told myself to spend as much quality time as I can with him.

It pains me to see him being treated in such a manner and the thought of him going to spend the rest of his life in loneliness broke my heart. The reason why my mom wants to divorce him is because she does not want to have anything to do with him.

He kept his silent despite all the lashing from my mom. That's when I feel the remorse in him.

That is why I forgive him.

I had a small chat with him just now. My mom was upset about it and forbidden me to chat with him.

He is my dad. Who is she to stop me from talking to my dad? Yes, she is my mother but she have no right to stop me from talking to my dad isn't it?

I feel hurt and so disappointed in her. I did not expect her to be so selfish. Sorry I need to vent it all out. Wat nonsense is this? A daughter cannot chat with her dad.

 

Hi Messenger,

I don't think that you did anything wrong by talking to him but perhaps in her mind she is scared you will get as badly emotionally hurt as she did and she's trying to protect you from that pain? I sincerely doubt she trusts him at all anymore, so that would be my guess as to why she is upset. You could maybe ask her whats going on and assure her that you love her very much, especially since she had to raise you mostly by herself and that you can understand her distrust of him but that you know yourself enough to know if/when you need to back off so as to keep you from getting severely hurt (and that if you do misjudge, you hope she will be there for you). Tell her you need to at least try to have some kind of relationship with your dad.... everyone needs the chance to try to have a relationship with their parents. I don't know, just some suggestions.