I am a 26 year old female who was diagnosed with bipolar and borderline personality disorder 13 years ago. I have a hard time dealing with this. I am on social security disability for the reasons mentioned above. When I get depressed it is really bad. All i can think about is suicide and it hurts (physically and mentally) to even get though the day. I can just see myself cycling downwards and just grabbing on to whatever I can to keep me safe until the cycle is over. I am in therapy and on medications, but my problem is I am so terrified to tell anyone my "true" feelings. I am so tired of hiding its so exhausting in doing so. I joined this forum to read other peoples stories and maybe be able to understand myself and get the courage to get help.