Well, I pissed him off.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by TooShyToScream, Jan 26, 2011.

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  1. TooShyToScream

    TooShyToScream Well-Known Member

    When my fiance and I first met, he used to spend every moment with me. He hardly paid attention to anything except me. Now, it seems all he wants to do is pay attention to the dog. And I don't care if anyone thinks this is crazy, but yes, I'm jealous. When something else gets his attention, I feel like I'm getting less of it and it makes me feel unimportant, uncared about, and sad. I was going to check my school's website for 5 minutes, and he wants to play with the dog...Why the hell? Why am I not good enough anymore? Why is the dog more interesting than me?

    I asked him nicely earlier today to pay more attention to me instead of the dog all the time, and then a few hours later, he does the exact opposite. "Well how do you expect us to ever keep a pet if you can't handle it? You need to take care of them every day..", he says. Yeah, well let's get a ferret then, or a turtle or something. All you have to do is feed them and that won't bother me. What about taking care of me? Doesn't that matter anymore? Or is taking care of the dog, who gets attention from everyone on a daily basis as it is, more important? I only get his attention..sometimes. The dog gets his, his mom's, his dad's, and sometimes mine. So what the fuck. And then he calls me selfish, so I flip out and tell him to go play with the god damn dog then if he wants to. So he lays in bed and pretends to sleep and won't talk to me now.

    UGH!! FUCK MY LIFE!!! :bash: I seriously hate it. We had a huge snowstorm today and I wasn't even sure if I could make it to college tomorrow in the first place, but now I don't give a shit to go at all. I don't give a shit about anything right now. I don't give a shit if I fail again like I did 2 other semesters, and most other things in my life that I've done as well. It'll just give me all the more reason to kill myself, which I so desperately desire right now. I need a way out. I can't take this. I just want him to love me, and I don't want to share. Why is that so wrong? It's not like I don't do the same for him.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    how about looking after the dog together with him showing him that you too care about his life and his interest. Maybe then he will see a side of you that is caring toward his needs as well.
     
  3. TooShyToScream

    TooShyToScream Well-Known Member

    Like I said, that dog gets enough attention from everybody as it is. And I feel like I don't get enough of his.
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    but you will get his attention because you will be right there with him.
     
  5. TooShyToScream

    TooShyToScream Well-Known Member

    That's not getting his attention. That's just being right next to him. The dog would still get his attention. I define getting his attention by doing something together without any outside distractions.
     
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