Welp...this is goodbye

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by enditnow123, Aug 18, 2007.

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  1. enditnow123

    enditnow123 Member

    I realize I haven't been here long but I just can't move on.
    No one try to talk me out of it. I already got it planned out and my note written. Thanks for all the support you've given me over this short time.

  2. silent_enigma

    silent_enigma Well-Known Member

    Hey, I didn't even meet you yet.

    What is the reason you plan on ending your life for?
  3. enditnow123

    enditnow123 Member

    Well many reasons. Three from the top.

    1 - This was two years ago (I was 12 at the time):
    Well I just got home from school, I walked in the door, into the kitchen to see my dad sitting by the cupboards with his 12-gauge. He said I am sorry and he shot himself. He didn't die right away so I called 911 and sat there with him talked to him and he told me how sorry he was and that he loved me with all of his heart and that he will be watching over me.

    2 - This was about a year ago (I was 13):
    Me and this girl started dating after the incident stated above. I was 12 when we first started dating and we had all or most of our firsts together. Then she turned her back on me and went to my best friend.

    3 - This was just recently:
    My best friend died in a drunken accident (yes thats him^^). I could have stopped him from going but I was to stubborn to because of what he did to me. Now I regret it.
  4. silent_enigma

    silent_enigma Well-Known Member

    Yeah, that sounds terrible. So you want to join them in death I guess.

    There's no way I can comprehend the pain you've been through.

    Hugs for you.
  5. I can't offer you hope. That would not be my place or gift to promise. You are young but been through so much. My father comitted suicide while we were all at home. I'm 45 and have seen a lot of suffering. I know what it's like to be at the bitter end. I wish you didn't feel the way you do, but I know it's part of some people's lives

    It's harder for some than for others...
    And they can offer all they want - those that haven't experienced Hell. It's empty


    I wish you peace wherever you go to from here. Truly. I miss it myself. I know.
  6. mlazenby

    mlazenby Member

    It's pretty friggin' messy, isn't it?

    Doesn't it seem like there should be some cleaner alternatives?

    I'm not saying there is something better. But, here's the thing: you can abandon everything you think you know about yourself and at least attempt something radically different. In a couple of years you can try being a whole different person.

    I didn't work for me, but I assure you that you can at least try it. Maybe it will work for you. The freedom of human choice is boundless.
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