We're All Cowards

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by the outsider, Mar 6, 2008.

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  1. the outsider

    the outsider Guest

    If we see that our suffering is not necessary and that we could end it all forever...why do we continue to live? It can only be fear. I sometimes think that the closest thing to the meaning of life is to realize that we should all take our lives. If we truly see no point to living then why don't we just kill ourselves immediately upon this conclusion?
  2. ScouseJM

    ScouseJM Well-Known Member

    One reason.. Hope x
  3. Carcinogen

    Carcinogen Well-Known Member

    Maybe for some if our lives cannot be anything decent then we may want our deaths at least to be as we want them, but cannot yet achieve the end we would choose due to circumstance.

    Not speaking for anyone else by any means.
  4. EllieThade

    EllieThade Antiquities Friend

    I agree with Scouse - there is that minute sense of hope. My therapist sometimes asks me why I bother coming to him (when I'm being particularly stubborn with him and not listening to his suggestions). I looked at him with tears in my eyes and said, "I guess I hope that you'll change my mind one day."

    I also keep thinking I should wait for certain things to happen. Wait until my step son gets married, so he won't be upset without me at his wedding. Wait until my mom dies so my death won't ruin the rest of her life. Wait until I'm sure that my daughter will be "okay." (When on earth that is, I don't know!)

    I'm not sure what I'm afraid of about dying. I don't think I'm really afraid to die. It's all I've thought about for many years. Yet, I guess I don't want to let certain people down, like those I mentioned above, and my trusted therapist, who has saved my life more times than I can count. Sometimes I hope these reasons will keep me from attempting anything. When I get really bad, I wish to Hell that these reasons didn't exist and then I could end it without guilt.
  5. ScouseJM

    ScouseJM Well-Known Member

    I wouldve slapped my therapist if he had said that to me
  6. Mathale

    Mathale Well-Known Member

    You question answers itself in my opinion. We dont kill ourselves because there is a point to live. The negative emotions that build up to escape from reality is only short term in the sense of the age of life. Depression is not the only sole emotion that we ever experience and so the positives to life keep us going. Yes we can be depressed for a very long time, but happiness is stronger. One laugh or a smile, or a recognition of care can keep us going.

    We all know suicide is an option, but there is always a better solution.
  7. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    In my case, there really isn't a reason that I don't. I just don't. Well, I don't want to hurt people who care for me but other than that, I don't do it because I don't have to. As long as I can go on living and functioning (even if it's at a minimal, pointless capacity), I will. Most likely.

    I don't know that I'm any more afraid of dying than I am anything else. I'm actually more frightened of life. I'm just........here.
  8. wanttodie

    wanttodie Well-Known Member

    I think I am a coward. I would love to die but I guess Im afraid of the despair and immense sadness I would feel in the last minutes of life.

    BOLIAO Guest

    because we have to take into consideration of our loved ones. the damage inflicted on them would be lifelong for them. Although we feel they might understand, they will not and they would keep blaming themselves for not doing enough to have prevented it. when we kill ourselves, we end our misery (if hell does not exist) but the trauma begins on our loved ones and will never end till they die.
  10. EllieThade

    EllieThade Antiquities Friend

    Originally Posted by EllieThade View Post
    I agree with Scouse - there is that minute sense of hope. My therapist sometimes asks me why I bother coming to him (when I'm being particularly stubborn with him and not listening to his suggestions). I looked at him with tears in my eyes and said, "I guess I hope that you'll change my mind one day."


    I wouldve slapped my therapist if he had said that to me

    Scouse - he didn't say it in a mean or demeaning or even frustrated way. He was trying to get me to find a reason for living and fighting. He knows I keep going to him to "fight." He asks me quite a few questions on occasion that he already knows the answer to. He just wants me to figure it out for myself and actually say it. He's actually very special to me. As I've said in a few posts already, he's saved my life more times than I can count. When I page him, he calls me back within minutes. If I'm in crisis, he always seems to be magically available to help me out. Years ago, he was trying to encourage me to find a reason to keep on living while I was going to college, and he told me he would go to my graduation. It took me 7 years to finish, and he showed up at my graduation (which was a 3 - 4 hour drive each way) in 2000. Now he's telling me that he wants to come to my daughter's wedding. She's only 12, so he's trying again to get me to stay alive at least until she gets married... He knows I count on him. He knows he's the only one I'll call when I'm in crisis (unless it's like 1 a.m. and I'll try the suicide hotline first). He knows how much I have come to care for him. And he's Mr. Super Ethical Therapist. I'll bet he's never gone to anyone else's graduation or offered to go to a wedding outside of his therapy office. He also knows me so well that he can read my face and he knows when something is wrong and I'm not saying anything. He knows I'll always tell him the truth. I know he will never be mad at me for messing up or yell at me or think of me badly no matter what I do. As bad as I felt last week for cutting after a whole year of managing not to harm myself, he ended up making me feel better about it.
  11. smackh2o

    smackh2o SF Supporter

    I agree with Matavin. Life and death are far too complicated for such rash decisions. It works the other way as well, people can't decide wether they want to live OR die. Depression can cause us to want to end it but there are always other feelings (that probably are getting a constant bashing from feeling depressed) that will try and make you feel differntly. Although fear is one of them.
  12. ScouseJM

    ScouseJM Well-Known Member

    my sincere apologies i hadnt thought about it that way.

    i am ver glad for u that u have someone like that, he sounds amazing x

    ps whats his number?? haha x
  13. the outsider

    the outsider Guest

    thank you for your honest insight. all the rest of the replies were all cowardly. afraid to leave the ones they love. some people have no one, why don't they commit suicide? it must be fear. the true aim in life is to overcome this fear.
  14. Reki

    Reki Well-Known Member

    A life spent trying to overcome the fear of death is a life of wasted time. You're here to live, not worry about the inevitable end that doesn't care whether you fear it or not and comes regardless.
  15. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    We're all Frankies. We're all lyin in Hell. Come on, get up! Come on get up! - Frankie Teardrop / Suicide
  16. downnout

    downnout Well-Known Member

    hope, hope, hope
  17. downnout

    downnout Well-Known Member

    to be honest, i'm not that afraid of dying. i've tried a few times and it wasn't fear that brought me back. it was the realization that there's no point in killing yourself, either, and whether you know people or not it does effect others. at least living, there's the hope that it MIGHT get better. killing yourself, you're either 1. just dead or 2. in hell. depending...
  18. the outsider

    the outsider Guest

    I now realize that I should've named this thread; "We're All Unwise" because that's the real problem, the fear is just an obstacle. We are not wise enough to rationally be aware of our non-existence being a far more preferable state than our existence. I am not saying we would be happier or anything of the sort that would involve conciousness, I am saying that our death will surely extinguish any conciousness we once had and therefore would not cause pain or happiness. We would be as we were before you were born, and how we are when we are in a deep sleep devoid of dreams.
  19. Rosenrot

    Rosenrot Forum Buddy

    The general stereotype of the afterlife is probably worse than the life I'm currently living, as it is.
  20. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    We are cowards if we dont commit a suicide, and we are cowards if we commit suicide. If we kill ourselves, ppl should say that we did that because we are cowards. But, also, you need a lot of courage to kill yourself.
    For example, we offen see in the movies, when a hero is in a very hard situation, he cannot escape, and he kills himself. And we say: Wow, he was so brave! Arent we in a similar situation?
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