I have been a member of this site two years. Two years today I think actually. There are 21 people in chat and right now I want to *method* and *method* and *method* and... Yet there is not a single person it is possible to talk to about it - any of it. What does that say about me? Don't want to worry anyone - I am not going to throw the towel in tonight - however much I might want to. Just - really want to talk to someone. Stupid.