What are they thinking?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by gentlelady, Feb 23, 2014.

  1. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    This may sound trivial and even uncaring but I need to vent this anyway. I have two young students, one age 12 the other 14, that have made serious attempts at ending their life within this past week. They were both admitted into the psych wing of the hospital for evaluation. The older of the two was diagnosed as psychotic and hears voices telling him to harm himself in various ways, including suicide. The other is still on suicide watch and I know she has what was described with a "heavy diagnosis" (all the information I am allowed to be told). Both will be on a new regimen of medication. Here is my issue. They will be released on Monday. On Wednesday I take my band on a trip that lasts for 4 days. We have competitions and high stress performances throughout this time period I have 30 students and one adult that takes the trip. These two students are members of the travelling group and I am to take them with me. School counselor feels it is "in their best interest" to go. I am concerned that it is too soon. I know what it is like the first days after being released from the psych ward. It is not an easy transition and who knows how the meds will affect these kids. They are also rooming with 3 other kids their own age. Kids that do not understand what is going on and are unaware of what has happened (privacy). So many things could go wrong. I would feel differently if I had trained professionals in the group to help monitor these two young people but I don't have anything of the sort. My worst fear is that one, or both, attempt again or, at the very least, have increased suicidal thoughts and the effects this will have on my other students. As a parent I would not want this for my child on either side. I would be afraid to send my child away for 4 days after only being home from a situation like that for two days. I can't even tell the other adult with me that we have a situation which needs to be closely monitored. Just what are they thinking!!?????
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    I agree with you, those kids shouldn't be going. Too much could go wrong. Are you able to talk to the parents, or due to privacy, are you not permitted to bring it up at all?
  3. JmpMster

    JmpMster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    That is a very sticky situation, I am sorry you find yourself in the middle of it. To be honest, I am a little surprised that their parents will allow it - I certainly would not let my daughter go on that type of trip with that amount of stress and lack of professional support regardless of what the school counselor says. I hope all goes smoothly and it does not make the trip too stressful for you to enjoy ... :hug:
  4. BornFree

    BornFree Well-Known Member

    What an awful situation... could you ask the head for a Dr's letter giving permission/clearance and advising protocols of their care before they are allowed to go? Possibly explain the legal implications of the school being liable if anything should go wrong... and especially if there were not enough adequate informed adults to supervise... in the UK there are laws that state the ratio of adults required per groups of 6 (I think) children...
    Very hard for you, :grouphug: take care of you too
  5. dancingbear

    dancingbear Member

    I must admit im totally perplexed after reading this. It does sound too soon and if i was in the same situation i would actually refuse to take them and speak to the parents and explain why. It just doesant seem right that you alone should be expected to shoulder what really the parents should be doing in this critical time where rest and care should be the priority.

    Ive certainly had some of the strangest of thoughts and urges when starting meds but old enough to realise it is a side effect and will plateau in a week or two.

    What alarms me the most is how young they are to be having these thoughts in the first place, they really do grow up fast these days.

    Hope everything works out.
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Those kids should not be going in my opinion, anything could happen. The title is perfectly written 'what were they thinking'. If I was faced with that situation, I would have a word with their parents, express your concerns and make sure they know you cannot deal with a situation like this alone, safety for everyone going on this trip is priority. Good luck with whatever you choose to do and with the trip.
  7. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I know I won't get anywhere but I decided to write up a formal letter of concern about the mandate these two students join us on this trip. I the regular classroom they have code words established to let us know they are feeling overwhelmed and need to be excused from class to go to a quiet place. If they can't be in a classroom for an extended time how can they ride a bus for 6 hours? Where do I send them from there. Not many options for a quiet place on a packed school bus. Then you get a gym full of athletes and spectators. Yep, quiet place easily accessible, right? Then we have the motel where they share rooms. So do I kick the other students out of their room with no place to go to accommodate a quiet place for 1? The response to my concern, "You will figure it out. You have always been good at handling the students with difficult issues". Excuse me????
  8. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    Wow... "You'll figure it out?" Sounds like a cop-out on their part because they either don't want to deal with the situation, or don't know how to deal with it. So they're throwing it back on you.