What brought everyone to this point?

[Tana]

What brought everyone to this point?
I am 22 but my depression started after 21st birthday. On my birthday i felt like my life was nothing but a failure. I lived all these years but have nothing to show for it.
I never a had a job, never had a boyfriend and still a virgin and have no major acomplishments in gernal .

I was struggling with my university classes.
I studied law but dont want to be a lawyer anymore.

These feelings dragged on and on. The future scares me so much.

I feel like i am never going to find my place in the world . Graduating university has worsened these feelings

I dont want to live to see the next 20 -30 years.

I dont want to take anti depressants because i am told they are addictive. I heard they make you gain weight. I prefer losing weight.

I dont want to be me anymore

"I dont want to take anti depressants because i am told they are addictive. I heard they make you gain weight. I prefer losing weight."

Let's weight down these cons with pros, shall we?

CONS:
1. Could be addictive? (Though, they're usually not. Were not for me. It's not like they bring your mood up when you don't need them. A happy person won't be happier on them).
2. Can make you gain weight.
3. Take about 2 weeks to start working.
4. You may not be affected by the first brand and will be given another. (However, people usually don't go over 3 tries).

PROS:
1. Can make you feel better
2. Save you from killing yourself
3. Bring back hope and motivation so you can get your life back in the track instead of being depressed and thinking about killing yourself at pretty much all time.

Think about it. Please. <3

 

[LonelyHiker]

Being born?.....

 

[Lennox]

I've registered before under another name. It was more than a year ago, but never talked on the forums. I destroyed a romantic relantionship. Alprazolam for sleep and exercise were keeping me alive.

Then, yesterday, another relationship went downhill. I blame myself so much. So guilty. I had only 3 hours of sleep with alprazolam, without rest, I feel out of sorts.

 

[Unknown_111]

I've registered before under another name. It was more than a year ago, but never talked on the forums. I destroyed a romantic relantionship. Alprazolam for sleep and exercise were keeping me alive.

Then, yesterday, another relationship went downhill. I blame myself so much. So guilty. I had only 3 hours of sleep with alprazolam, without rest, I feel out of sorts.

Welcome back to the forum. We are here for YOU. Don't worry now as YOU are apart of the SF family.

 

[Lennox]

Thank you so much. I'm literally crying right now, as I write this my mother reachs out with 2 meaningless Whatsapp messages. She knows Iam hurting but pretty much gave up trying to help.2

 

[Lennox]

I did not mean to put these emojis there lol

 

[Tana]

Thank you so much. I'm literally crying right now, as I write this my mother reachs out with 2 meaningless Whatsapp messages. She knows Iam hurting but pretty much gave up trying to help.2

I'm sorry.
We're here.

 

[JCC988]

I first registered on this site not too long after I lost my first job and my father a little over 3 years ago. I was looking for methods. And here I am now. A semi active member of this site.

 

[Gonz]

Been depressed and anxious, in and out of treatment, ever since some fairly traumatic childhood stuff. Have had various diagnoses suggested over the years. Have always had some agoraphobic tendencies; shut myself in for a few weeks here, half a year there.

Managed to make something of a life for myself. Not really what anyone would consider happy or healthy or productive; fair amount of drug abuse, chronic unemployment. But something, at least. Had a wife and an apartment and friends.

One day, about three and a half years ago, I came home and found my wife dead in our bed. She had choked on her own vomit after taking too many Oxy.

I completely fell apart. On top of the absolutely horrific pain of losing her, all my old issues came back, x1000, at the same time that I lost the only coping mechanism/support system that had ever helped me.

Moved into a trailer on my parent’s property, and have barely gone outside in the time since then.

 

[Tana]

Been depressed and anxious, in and out of treatment, ever since some fairly traumatic childhood stuff. Have had various diagnoses suggested over the years. Have always had some agoraphobic tendencies; shut myself in for a few weeks here, half a year there.

Managed to make something of a life for myself. Not really what anyone would consider happy or healthy or productive; fair amount of drug abuse, chronic unemployment. But something, at least. Had a wife and an apartment and friends.

One day, about three and a half years ago, I came home and found my wife dead in our bed. She had choked on her own vomit after taking too many Oxy.

I completely fell apart. On top of the absolutely horrific pain of losing her, all my old issues came back, x1000, at the same time that I lost the only coping mechanism/support system that had ever helped me.

Moved into a trailer on my parent’s property, and have barely gone outside in the time since then.

 

[Inanimate]

I dont want to take anti depressants because i am told they are addictive. I heard they make you gain weight. I prefer losing weight.

I’ve taken numerous antidepressants, none of which made me gain weight. In fact, the only medication that made me gain weight was an antipsychotic, which was prescribed by my primary care physician, that was meant to be an adjunct to my antidepressant. Furthermore, it was one that was infamous for causing weight gain.

Per usual, withdrawal symptoms only occur when you miss a dose or you’re tapering off a drug. In my experience, having to cope with side effects and withdrawal symptoms was rare. As long as you diligently taper off the drug(s) as instructed, symptoms will be minimized and you probably won’t suffer as much as you’re being led to believe.

All in all, drug withdrawal, weight gain, and other side effects, are individualized, so don’t let fearmongering and one person’s anecdote dissuade you from doing what’s necessary and potentially getting real results.

 

[iloverachel]

Just curious...what brought everyone to this point ... the point of considering ending your life? Mine was trauma and the ensuing bad behavior on my part.
When did a medicine start working for you? I have tried more medications than I can count but nothing but clonazapam seems to help. I am also on my 3rd therapist with whom I hope to do EMDR therapy with. I personally feel like nothing will work for me but I am trying to hold on as I have a wonderful life and a grand baby on the way.

Losing so many friends
Losing hope
Feeling crap daily for 5 yeare
Uncontrollable irritability
Major depressive symptoms
Anxiety with every aspect of life
Feeling alone
Horrible intrusive thoughts
Death of dog

 

[Auri]

I dont want to take anti depressants because i am told they are addictive. I heard they make you gain weight. I prefer losing weight.

Nope, they're not addictive. And I didn't take a gram on my antidepressants, if anything I lost weight.