So the only reason I came to these forums was to get help. I want to die but at the same time I wantt other perspectives on the matter which I cant get from people close to me because they will think im a nut. I didnt get help here so now im considering a psychiatrist but I dont want to be put on anti depressants. Ive seen people on anti depressants and it screws them up. Anybody have any experience with psychiatrists?