What do you do if all you think about is ending your life

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by givenuponlife, May 1, 2011.

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  1. givenuponlife

    givenuponlife Well-Known Member

    That's how I feel everyday, the thoughts of suicide are in my head 24/7 and I can't shake them. It is scaring me that I will act on them and I don't mean in awhile but soon. They are getting worse and worse as the days go on.
     
  2. ExtreemWays

    ExtreemWays Active Member

    Me too. I think about suicide a lot. Many times a day.

    Even my meds have trouble controlling my suicidal thoughts/tendancies.

    All I can say is see a psychiatrist, sooner rather than later. Despite what I say above, medication can help with suicidal thoughts.
     
  3. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    can you talk about anything that you are doing for treatment?

    hopefully we can help!
     
  4. givenuponlife

    givenuponlife Well-Known Member

    Nothing is being done for treatment because the doctors here are stupid and are afraid to help me in anyway. I went to crisis one time last year and they sent me home the same night. A month later i was able to read the report and the 1st line in it said patient is very suicidal......So what does that tell you. I am getting tired of being pushed aside and under the rug.

    I just don't know anymore, i am getting worse as the days go by and I don't know how much longer I can hold on.
     
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You go back to hospital and tell them you do not want to be released you are very frightened you will harm you You make them hear okay Call crisis line and tell them you need help NOW don't let them push you aside don't
     
  6. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member



    that's what people do to me, push me aside. and i'm sick of it too

    i have these thoughts 24/7, and apart from seeing someone once a week to talk about things.. that's all they are willing to do

    kind of frustrates me- i know i'm going to do it soon. and then it's going to be to late for help- and it will be too late to save me
     
  7. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    print of what you just said and give it to your councillor or doctor make them see okay
     
  8. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Stop what your doing and go to the ER immediately..Ask for someone in mental health because your suicidal and have a plan..They should admit you andget you stabilised on meds before releasing you..It's not that bad in the hospital.. They will keep you safe..
     
  9. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    was there any discussion about your getting medication or therapy?

    it seems like the medical system has failed you. I think that you should be able to get some treatment and feel better, but you may have to wrestle with the system a little. we might be able to help you with that
     
  10. givenuponlife

    givenuponlife Well-Known Member

    I have been on medications but because i haven't been properly diagnosed he was only playing Russian roulette with my meds and my health. And seeing my doctor that I had for my mental health retired I haven't seen one in a year and a half now. And for therapy.....that's a joke where I live, I have tried getting into a counselor many times now and all I get from them is this is temporary until you can find someone more permanent. So yeah the health system has failed me big time and I just don't know what to do anymore. It is so screwed up that I am not the only one that has slipped through the health care system cracks.....There are a lot of people in the city I live in that have been pushed aside like there is nothing wrong with them when clearly there is a problem...and most of the times the problems are not small..like mine.
     
  11. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    i hope you are ok, get yourself off to hospital and tell them you are suicidal and havent seen anyone for so long etc...meds not working...failing that phone a crisis line and tell them what you have told us here and maybe they will back you up...its not fair that you are left out the loop, the prob is like where i live, mental health is low priority altho the reason i got admitted was that if i didnt go willingly i was threatened with section and i had 2 days to think about it but i went same day as i knew i wouldnt last another 2 days.

    it was a hard decision for me...but if i can do it so can you, get yourself to hospital now and tell them you need help NOW not tomorrow next week or next month. while you do nothing, they will take it that you are ok...dont let the system make you worse...you deserve help...demand it/ :hug:
     
  12. givenuponlife

    givenuponlife Well-Known Member

    I have demanded it time and time again and I still get treated the same way...I even brought my advocate in last time to get it through to them on exactly how bad I am/was. I have also phoned crisis and its the same thing everytime, go down to the ER and i go and they send me home....the ER is like a revolving door and i am just tired of it.
     
  13. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    in what country are you living?

    are you in the states?

    do you have insurance now?

    some doctors are better than others. you might be able to see a new doctor who will be able to give you a better diagnosis and treatment
     
  14. givenuponlife

    givenuponlife Well-Known Member

    I live in Ontario Canada. And yes our health care system is good here, but the city i live in sucks.. it is impossible to get into a new doctor unless you are on a waiting list for months/years. Especially a GP some ppl here wait almost a decade to get a family doctor or longer.
     
  15. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    you might want to put a post in the "uncertainty principle" forum

    asking about how to navigate the health care system where you are. there may be someone who knows about the system that could help
     
  16. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    are u in toronto? i know of a good hospital here. can u get to toronto? your health card is good anywhere in the province.

    i've been helped at st joseph's health centre. they have short stay (72 hour) and long stay units, as well as a 3 week to 5 week intensive outpatient program. i've been in 5 times, each time for feeling suicidal, not actual attempts. they are very responsive and the doc in charge, dr. driver is good.

    there is also camh. i haven't used them but have heard good things.
     
  17. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    CAMH is excellent care were very kind and professional go to emerg there and you will get the treatment you need
     
  18. givenuponlife

    givenuponlife Well-Known Member

    I wish I could get to Toronto but i have no way of getting there, but I do finally have an appointment on Tuesday with a nurse.....don't know how that is going to go.... hopefully i can make it that long.
     
  19. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    print off this thread and take it with you. it explains very eloquently how frustrated you feel and how you are not getting the support you need. or write a letter saying the same things and give it to her to read.
     
  20. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    hmmm... maybe we can help with an idea for how you can get to toronto


    I hope that you make it to your appointment and that it goes well!
     
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