What do you do when you don't know what to do?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Freya, Jan 7, 2014.

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  1. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    Sounds like a stupid question I know. But I do not know what to do - and I do not understand how you are supposed to know what to do when you don't know what to do.

    So - what do YOU do when you don't know what to do?
  2. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Ask questions if I care enuff to find out or wander away like a Cheshire Cat I am sometimes looking back to see what happened
  3. Cariad_Bach

    Cariad_Bach Staff Alumni

    Just keep swimming?

    Failing that, talk, talk, be good to self, talk.
  4. demuredawn

    demuredawn Well-Known Member

    usually, i end up crying a bit, then sleeping a bit, then gathering up courage to tell ppl how much of an idiot i feel b/c i can't figure out what to do... then generally speaking someone presents themself to me as being "in need of help" ... i do what i can to help them, thus distracting me from my own pain for a bit, and sometimes even offering me some kind of help that i never thought of for myself... then by that time, i again have energy to do my distraction techniques til i can figure out wtf to do to really help me ... kinda what i'm stuck in atm...
  5. IamTetsuo

    IamTetsuo Well-Known Member

    think, or do nothing, or make a sandwich :p

    Seriously though, I've been feeling a bit better lately, and I've been thinking about what's important to me, what do I want from this life, what is achievable and what will help my self esteem. I've scaled down my horizons a lot - I'd like to keep my exercise up , do some volunteer work and practice drawing and maybe learn how to do water-colours and inks.

    Simple things and maybe it will raise my self esteem and I can build a little bit more - I can always kill myself next year anyway:)

    Maybe try to strip away all the expectations of things that seem out of reach and think about starting small - made me feel more hopeful anyway.
  6. Freya,
    I bet yur looking for some advice, really - not just just a description of what others do when they don't know what to do.
    To answer your question... What I do when I don't know what to do is ask someone that I know and trust what they would do if they were me. I wouldn't just ask anyone that I know and trust... Out of all the people I know and trust I would pick one that can most relate to what I am going through, perhaps someone who can relate to my feelings (not necessarily my situation) and I would ask that person - and I would do it in such a way that it was face to face and also just us two, none of their friends around. It would be somebody that cares.

    That would be my first step. My second step is always to go alone after that to a safe environment... For me that's my house or a cafe or a pizza place or even the back seat of my car - I guess what I mean by a safe place is somewhere I feel alone, where I can collect my thoughts (I don't mean a physically safe place). Then I consider what I learn. Perhaps I would do this more than once before I figure out what to do.

    -That's all I know. That, what I just said has worked for me so far.
  7. emily83

    emily83 Well-Known Member

    i start comparing myself to everyone who has a better life than i do.

    i know, hardly the way to go about it, but it's all i can really do in those times

    or i come on here and hope that someone sent me a message and i'll talk to them about.. well, what ever really. lol
  8. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    The question is a tuff one. We all go through this question everyday. Sometimes the sea of turmoil drowns us and we sink to the bottom in despair. Or sometimes we just about swim along. With my crisis, the only thought that prevails especially when I wake up is one. "I'm alive and I'm breathing today. The simplest thing like breathing air makes you appreciate life. Each day all of us struggle but with that simple thought, it keeps me going. The other side, if there is a god, then then the entity would have stopped me breathing.

    We all struggle on a day to day basis but the support of this forum we can get through our crisis together. It takes all different people from different walks of life to help each one of us. I thank you for reading this posting and I hope it helps you in your hour of need. Much respect to this forum.
  9. scaryforest

    scaryforest Banned Member

    sleep on it.
    when all else fails, sleep is best medicine...
  10. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Whatis you do when you don't have the answers I go to my therapist ask him because he has the knowledge the know how and has been trained to help when no one else can

    If you know someone a church person also has been trained or a councilor your doctor talk to them ok talk to someone that has the skills to help you see where you are at and how to get out of it safely hugs
  11. scaryforest

    scaryforest Banned Member

    oh yeah, talking about church.
    that appeals somewhat, maybe 'cause aura.
    but how to go there and not get panic attacks 'cause you're unsure of everything ever to do with attending a church..
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