What do you feel when...?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by lionsheart, Jul 26, 2010.

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  1. lionsheart

    lionsheart Member

    What do you feel when your life was miserable and you thought that you found someone who made your world shine, but you discovered that she was type of person you always hated?

    It happened to me. I was 16 when I found my first love. She was so sad when I met her and I just wanted to make her happy somehow.
    I had an accident when I was a child, so I'm not the gorgeous guy around. She ended up leaving me with no reason after a 1,5 year.

    Until the day before we broke up, she told me that she was so happy by my side. She made me believe that we could be together again. Days later I discovered she was dating two guys (One is her boyfriend now (a long time friend I never heard about before), but he doesn't know about the other one). Her friend told me that she wanted to have sex with one of them, but she doesn't know that she was a virgin.
    My heart was broken, but she asked for my friendship and I accepted, because I want her to be happy.

    I told her about my crappy life; I wanted to tell her why I preferred to be alone sometimes; that I will still be on her side after knowing all that stuff. She cried on the phone when I told her the details.

    She ended up lying again and again...pretending that she cared about me, but when I cried she laughed; she never introduced me to her family or friends and now she does that with her new boyfriend; she said that she couldn't go out with me because her parents would let her, but now she does.

    I guess she loves with her eyes and not with her heart.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 26, 2010
  2. ema

    ema Antiquities Friend

    It doesn't sound like this is the best partner for you. She doesn't treat you with respect.

    You deserve much better than this. And you are young. I know, that sounds trite, but it's true. You have a life ahead of you and people who will care, respect and love you. I promise.

    It's time to move on. I would stop hanging out with her and if she asks why, tell her you don't like her lies and her bad treatment. And don't fall back if she promises to change. She hasn't show herself to be trustworthy that way.

    Sorry that you hurt so much. It's hard. I would give you a big band-aid for your pain if I could.

    Remember you are worth more. And treat yourself to something special. Take care of yourself.
  3. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Do not worry, not all females are like this in the adult world. In fact, there are many women who find a loving, sensitive, caring guy very appealing. I seriously doubt it was the way you look that made her wander off. It was her age, and I know this because at her age I was used and abused by my first love as well. I used to be shy and I was always the new girl. People used to tease me mercilessly and I really liked this one guy who was nobody popular or anything. He would be my boyfriend until someone better came along, and he would dump me. Like on my birthday. Needless to say, I stayed with him longer than I would like to admit. I should have dumped him! I deserve better, and now have better. You do too, and you will find a woman perfect for you, but I would not worry about that now. Right now I would focus on me and discover what type of person I am going to be for my friends, and girlfriends in the future. What type of man are you? What type of man do you want to be? And I would work towards being those things, and getting my life together before I worry about sharing it with anyone seriously. :hug: Blessings..
  4. Edgar Roni Figaro

    Edgar Roni Figaro Well-Known Member

    Younger women(not all but many) tend to be more superficial around the age of 16-27. During those times you will see women looking for the most attractive guy and not really paying attention to the person.

    But when women start to reach the age of wanting a family and mature out of the early adult years that is when they start looking at a person based on who they are and not just what they look like. It is not in the biological interest of a woman to be with the type of man many of them seek out at a young age.

    This girl sounds like she is still very immature and going through the typical superficial stage of life. I would distance myself from her if I were you since she is going to do nothing but cause you pain and suffering which you do not deserve.

    (And just so the women on the board don't try to chop my head off men are very superficial and admittedly place more on looks than they should. But again it's human biology)
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