Turning 50 is really not any different than any other day. You haven't expired, sweetie, don't say that. You can still do plenty of things, that number really means nothing. Your age is inside you. There are also some pretty cheap sprays now for blonds and brunettes that you can spray on your roots between shampoos, it works pretty well to cover grey roots. I don't get why people think aging signs are "ugly", I find them natural and just a part of life. Everyone has them at some point, they're just there. I think you could learn to love yourself the way you are, that is beautiful, social standards are random and don't say anything about you.