Seeing as the so called professionals in the NHS are not taking my health seriously I am in the process of saving to afford a private consultation in the hope of seeing someone one consultant rather than some SHO who doesn’t care or certainly comes across this way. I have suspected I was Bipolar II for over two years but never mentioned it to anyone let the professionals pick it up. They did eventually mention I could be when I was taken to A&E via the Crisis Team this year, but after seeing a PDOC on three occasions he decided it was Recurrent Depression. Okay so a run down… I have suffered mood swings since my teens, massive bouts of anger and have always been irritable, restless and suffered problems sleeping. My first bout of depression came in 2000 when I was 22, I didn’t realise I was depressed it was a close friend who prompted me to see my GP after my work was suffering, I was not my normal self and I’d been pulled up at work by a manager. GP gave me two weeks off work and Prozac which I had a reaction to, made me very irritable, restless and on edge. I didn’t return to my doctor but said to my friend I stopped taking the Prozac as I hated the affect I had on it. From then on in, my life went down hill. My mood swings became rapid, my anger and aggression more frequent. I was paranoid, irritable, restless and liked to take risks. I ran up a lot of debt normally when I would think would be classed as Hypomania (£10,000) which resulted in bankruptcy. I changed jobs, never being content and friends came and went. On top of that my self harming was comfort eating and binge drinking now and again. I also love to gamble, anything from online, horses or the lotto and scratch cards. This has been my life for a number of years and I am struggling to continue living like this. I have tried several anti-depressants some have produced rapid cycling, Citalopram I am on now always leaves my mood swings more frequent but it’s take that or get severely depressed and attempt suicide again. There is a whole other heap of stuff I have not mentioned, like making decisions then having major regrets. Starting arguments over nothing because I couldn’t control the urge not to, damaging my fathers car because I was in a mood and even this year I obtained a police caution because I lost my temper with a kid. Would you say if you where the professional this was possible Bipolar or more like Borderline Personality Disorder. I am confused, I’ve only just started to read about BPD so I don’t know everything about it. My main concerns are the rapid changes in mood swings, at one point they would change every few days, but for the past 18 months they seem change hourly, daily… I just never know how I am going to feel. I forgot to add, there may be possible Bipolar in the family. Not with my immediate parents but mum's sister, my grandma and greatgrandfather. This was told to the PDOC who didn't take it on board.