what I am not hearing here is solutions, ideas to help us cope with the sad circumstances of our lives NOW. No, we were not always hopeless. I have and am trying everything possible to find a reason to live beyond my kitty needs me. One by one I am failing at everything I do to improve my life, like a curse has been placed upon me. But a common theme is loneliness, it is a killer. So I offer one solution I try to employ. Dance night. Every weekend, I find free music, no cover, and I force myself to go out and dance. It has helped. May I suggest finding something you like and attempting it with like minded people. Just a small option, but it may help u.