What if it isn't "temporary"?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Oenone, Jul 11, 2008.

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  1. Oenone

    Oenone Member

    How do I cope with problems (plural) that are indefinite, ongoing, intensely painful to begin with, and getting more painful by the minute? "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem", they say, but what about problems that aren't temporary and aren't solvable?

    I am not contemplating suicide because I broke up with a boyfriend or had a fight with my mom or dropped out of school. I am educated, married, and have a high-paying job. I am what people would call "socially successful". And yet, there are three huge, humongous problems in my life which just cannot be resolved. Cannot -- take my word for it. A mental health worker would probably tell me "acceptance" is the way to go, but in my opinion "acceptance" is just another one of those fifty-cent words, one-size-fits-all solutions that have no relevance to my personal afflictions. I refuse to accept, period. Why accept something for its own sake? I am so tired, so very exasperated. I just want the nightmare to stop.

    I don't know what else to say. The things that make me want to kill myself aren't going away, ever. How do I find the strength to clench my teeth for the next 45 years or so, until I die of natural causes? (Hopefully, it will be sooner.)
  2. Hazel

    Hazel SF & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    It sounds as though these feelings have been building up for some time, have you spoken to anyone about them, perhaps your family doctor or a counsellor?
    I'm not sure about that (depending on the problems) but these feelings are making you feel suicidal therefore I think most mental health worker's would consider they needed more intervention than acceptance.
    From a comment you made in another thread I think marital problems may be part of why you feel the way you do, I can empathise with that and believe me, you don't have to clench your teeth for the next 45 years or so.
    There is help out there and you now have the members here to support you too.

    Take care Hazel
  3. janie

    janie Well-Known Member

    can you go in to the 3 problems in a bit more detail? I wont try to find ways to help you solve them i'll take your word for it that they cannot be resolved. Its just hard answering your question without a better idea of the problems you are facing
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    While some problems may not be temporary, there are usually things that can be done to alter them to some degree. Without a little more detail as to what the issues you face are, it is hard to try and brainstorm any solutions. I hope you can find reasons to continue on for the next 45 years or even longer. I would suggest you do try counseling and see if you can find relief there. :hug:
  5. nedflanders

    nedflanders Well-Known Member

    Heh. We seem to be birds of a feather.

    Well said. Just like all the damn hugs given out around here whenever people don't know what to say.

    Dunno. Inertia? Or perhaps you could just try to find pleasure in annoying others, as I do.
  6. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    I agree with others that you need therapy! I don't know about meds only a doc can determin that. If you see atherapist they can teach you coping skills and how to recognise cognitive distortions.
    I do hope you will keep posting, if nothing else just to vent and get that trash out of your head. Give it a go. See if you can find the answers to your questions. Take Care!!!:chopper:
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