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What if you really don't have anyone?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by FL1, Jul 20, 2010.

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  1. FL1

    FL1 New Member

    They always say to think about the people around you, and how they might feel if you decide to take your life, however what happens when regardless If I was to take my own life or get hit by a truck accidentally nobody will know and or care. I feel like I'm tired of fighting for happiness and constantly losing the battle, and my existence doesn't matter, so what is really my purpose of waking up every morning.

    I guess there is someone that feels the same, I just don't know what to do, and at this point I don't have funds or anything to get a therapist or a damn friend, im really just working with myself here.
  2. empty101

    empty101 Well-Known Member

    If you have no one then the cure to your misery is obvious. Instead of killing yourself find someone who cares and I bet you won't want to kill yourself anymore.

    I guarantee there are people who will notice if you're gone. Even if you haven't talked to some of them in years or you just pass by them every day they would be sad if they found out you killed yourself.
  3. FL1

    FL1 New Member

    You are exactly right.
  4. infiniti1027

    infiniti1027 Member

    I guess my mom would care, but she has her own life and we really aren't that close. We don't hate each other or fight or anything, we just don't talk that much. She is retired and travels with my stepdad all over the place.

    Our family is not that big, either.

    My brother would get over it as we've never been that close either. We're more like acquaintances.

    Then there are my kids. I think my death would devastate them the most, but they take me for granted and take advantage of me and the only reason they really need me around is to take care of them, provide them with money, a place to live, utilities, cable, cell phones, and whatever else they want or need. Their dad can do all that for them, although he may not spoil them as much as I have, but I basically get disrespected for spoiling them, though I know that's my own fault. Still ....

    I think perhaps my death would bring to light how much more they loved me than just what I could do for them, but I want them to know about that NOW, and if they don't know about it until it's too late, then too bad on them.

    I'm tired of being used and needed. I want to have my chance to need someone and have someone there for me, and it just isn't going to happen.

    I really don't feel like I have anyone, and don't feel like I ever will. I want to be cremated, no memorial service or funeral necessary. Why waste the space in a chapel or church for about 6 people who MIGHT show up when there could be another more important funeral to take that time slot?
  5. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Hi FL1. I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling so down right now. You are right about one thing though. You still have yourself. You can still change your life. If you're looking for some help and support then you've come to the right place. There are lots of really helpful people here always willing to offer kind, caring support. Please don't give up. :hug:
  6. EmptyLife

    EmptyLife Well-Known Member

    I really have no one. I nearly died of an overdose when I was 19. I was in intensive care for two days and a miserable psych ward for two months. My aunt lived 15 minutes away and never even sent a card, let alone visited. She defends herself to this day. No one visited or wrote to me. Is it any wonder I have such problems with feeling alienated?
    I am sick and tired of everyone saying your family will miss you. That is not true in every case. Some people have rotten, cruel families.
    I have not had a single moment of pleasure in at least 34 years, and I am sorry I lived.
    It's like saying depression is treatable. Unfortunately, it's not always. People don't want to see the horrid truth.
  7. Autumn01

    Autumn01 Well-Known Member

    I know how you feel- I don't see the point in getting up every morning either.
    My life is worthless and I'm worthless.
  8. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey FL1,
    You have come to the right place to open up or even just PM a member to talk..Your not alone in this.. There are quite a few of us who are suicidal but we come here and the members usually are able to talk you out of it.. I was suid=cidal last month and they rallied around me..People I haven't heard from in a year even came forward..Reach out to us and we will grab your hand.. Oh and welcome to the forums..
  9. flowingriver

    flowingriver Well-Known Member

    FL1, you sound young and as long as you are living you'll find someone to live for. At least you'll still be in the game.:hugtackles:
  10. mortdesinos

    mortdesinos Well-Known Member

    It is easy to get stuck in a state of inner turmoil centered around this idea:

    "I feel lonely, therefore nobody likes me, therefore I should die and there is no point to life anyway."

    But I ask you to take a step back, and gradually abandon these heretic thoughts, with the help of your friends. Yes, I said your friends. There are people around you, people you see or who see you on a consistent basis. It doesn't mean they are your friends, or your family. But you may have friends or family. It doesn't mean they are your neighbors, but they might be your neighbors. There is someone who can be your friend, and I am just following the ideology that you have no friends as of now, which is probably not true in the first place.

    Now, if you are having contrary thoughts, or if you are thinking "it's not that easy," "I can't help how I feel," or "just shut up and leave me alone," I would respond by affirming that I have been in your footsteps. And others here have too. Again, I ask you to reproach from your sinful thoughts. I am not proposing that you suddenly try to enjoy life, or that you find a friend in everyone you meet. I presume you would not be naturally inclined to immerse yourself in attention at this point. But that pertains to my most important point, which follows, henceforth.

    I suggest you not lose hope of all for which you wish. Help comes by when you least expect it.

  11. Marty482

    Marty482 Well-Known Member

    YOU have US. We will be your friend. Im praying for you and hope you do too.
    There is usually free therapy if you look around. Also 12 step groups are free.Many options. You have a whole network of friends here! NEVER GIVE UP. We are here and will help you through this. PLEASE STAY, there is nothing but HOPE HERE!

    Write me if you like,

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