everyone says itll get better... that its just a phase... or an urge.. to sleep it out.. i try to .. and i do... but what i wake too.. i wake to nothing.. the feeling of lonliness... the pain of unsure... everytime i try to move on its like something pushes me back to the same place... it all started with my ex.. but i thought i was doing the right thing moving on.. i wasnt.. i was just sleeping with every guy to feel loved for a little bit.. but there was no love.... and then i tried to stop but guys.. they just thats all they did.. when i took some serious i trusted them.. theyd fuck me and never say a word to me again.. i feel used... i started to leave marks on my wrist.. i wasnt tryin to i just picked soemthin up next thing i know theres the marks... beautiful im alive marks... then the thoughts came... and im fine during the day... you could evens say i seem normal.. but at night... they come on strong.. and i dont know which way to go.. its like a battle inside of me... one side says no the other side says yes..... i know it doesnt make sense.. nothing in mylife seems to make sense anymore.. its all falling apart... and im left broken and alone....