I just don't see the point of trying to carry on... I have spent 12 years now fighting depression. I start to think I'm getting better, but the next time it hits me, it's worse. I haven't been able to think of anything for weeks except killing myself. I don't want to eat, or talk to people, or even leave my bed. I have called in sick to work because I physically cannot get up. There is no one in my life who I can even talk to about how I feel, or who even really knows me. I don't want to be here. I don't want to be anywhere else either though. I just don't want to be anymore.