What is the Point?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by BK_Jetsfan, Nov 26, 2011.

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  1. BK_Jetsfan

    BK_Jetsfan Well-Known Member

    Seriously, life is so overrated. Who will remember us or care 1,2 generations tops from now. My existense, the existense of most of us is irrelevant. Add to that the fact that I am clearly unlovable, and I really don't see why we rate living so highly. It's worthless.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    No one is un lovable hun and we ourselves make a point to what living will be. You have to find a purpose and go after it okay
  3. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I think if you want to find meaning, you have to look much more in the 'now'...it is rare that someone has that type of impact on generations, but more doable to ask, what do you contribute now...and as TE has said, no one is unloveable unless s/he puts up the walls necessary to block people out...maybe there is someone here you can let in
  4. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    I've had that thought before, too. That in a hundred years it won't matter whether we were here or what we did.

    So I fed geese for a while, the ones at the park. Most of them probably won't be alive in five years, but for today, they were alive and I could find a sense of accomplishment in doing something kind for them, and enjoy watching them.
    It matters what we do today.

    I'm glad you're here, the time may come when I need some help or encouragement from you.
  5. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    BK Jetsfan, the human animal is something so very further evolved and capable of so very much. as far as not really mattering or such, life is what you one makes it.. suggest trying to reach out to others is perhaps a place to start.. a smile, a how you doing today and such..

    after probably a bit of suprise from the other person, maybe a real and relavant conversation will take place. we all have so very much in common. the reaching out to someone else just might find them returning the favor in your direction.. so many possibilites.. that require very little effort to start with..

    the here and now is what is relavant. the Balls in your court..
  6. BK_Jetsfan

    BK_Jetsfan Well-Known Member

    Just feel like my life is meaningless,and if I die now,who really gives a shit? Who's life is so unalterably affected by my passing. Answer is: absolutely no one.
  7. WhateverDan

    WhateverDan Member

    I try to look at life on the short term, which is the opposite of what most people will suggest. For instance what can I do to make life fun right now, or at least start the process, dating sites can be fun if you're single or hanging out with friends if you have them (I don't have any, so I'm certainly not judging).

    Even if it's just little things like playing a video game, watching tv, playing guitar, writing music, poetry. If you can, try to take a shot at something that will immediatly bring you some form of happiness, these are some of the things I enjoy.
  8. BK_Jetsfan

    BK_Jetsfan Well-Known Member

    I do try, typically with video games and watching football. But one of the problems is my girlfriend. I love her more than I've ever loved anyone. Now, I'm 37, I'm not some idiot who's going to kill himself over a woman per se. But I have been married and divorced and in and out of relationships and I've never felt this way before. I've never given so much of myself so completely before. And yet, she just doesn't love me. And we live together, so having that ALWAYS in my face, the escapes just aren't escape enough until I ultimately escape.

    Now, it's more than just my relationship that has me ready to die. I'm a failure in pretty much every respect. And my girlfriend, I mean, who could blame her really. There's something defective about me. But it just sucks. I'm awfully tired. I've been teetering on the edge for a while now, but I think I'm finally ready to just stop this stupidity which is my continued existence.
  9. BK_Jetsfan

    BK_Jetsfan Well-Known Member

    The last few days have just cemented in the belief that I'm somehow defective, and completely unlovable.

    And honestly, even focusing on the right now, my life brings value to absolutely no one. My continued existence has neither long nor short term impact. It feels so bad to truly understand and grsp that concept, but it's true. Clock is ticking. I'm really done.
  10. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    Sending you the biggest hug I can muster, BK... You are not worthless, defective and unlovable. You've been there for me when I needed a friend, and unless I really am also worthless, that is really something. You know that I understand how you feel. Life is cold and cruel too much of the time for some of us. It's not fair, and you don't deserve to hurt like you do. But you do deserve a chance to live, move beyond this pain and find happiness. Please know that I am one of your many SF friends who truly care and want you to survive. I'm a mess too... but I'm here for you! :console:
  11. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    I don't think you're defective, or unlovable. Sometimes we are so critical and judgmental of ourselves, and we feel like the entire world sees us that way.

    Have you talked to the other person about their feelings for you?

    People can be loving, but have problems expressing it.

    The world can be harsh, but it can also be sweeter than you can imagine. I know that from experience. Sometimes it takes just existing through the bad patches, learning what you can and waiting for the ball to come back to you.
    I know the waiting is hard, but we're here for you, you've got a lot of support here.

    I was a year or two older than you when I met my love, the woman who loved me back, admired me and was devoted to me.

    Hugs to you, man.
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 30, 2011
  12. MorganaNever

    MorganaNever Well-Known Member

    If you had a complete freedom to shape your life doing what you love, whatever it is, and there was no judgment for any choice you make, would you feel you would have things that would make life worth it even without a strict point?
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