I recently reconnected with a girl I knew in high school who had been traveling around the country for a few years. We met up a couple of times, with other people, but she just seems to want to use me as a vent and she wants to know if I have "hot friends." She's teased me about being with her, but she told me she doesn't want to hang out with anyone right now because she's depressed and doesn't even want to leave her house.. yet she sent me a text saying that she was outside taking a walk and then out with a friend for a short time. Then I was speaking with another girl last night. I told her I had been feeling invisible, and I asked her if I was just depressed or if I was crazy and something was really wrong with me. She didn't say anything for a while, so I said that I assumed she thought there was something wrong with me. Then she told me that's the case with a lot of people. Oh, but she says she still wants to hang out. I don't think anyone wants to spend time with me except people who are lonely and have extremely low self esteem. And maybe that's a bitter statement. But I'm just trying to tell it like it is. Maybe I don't have anything going for me right now. Maybe I have to reclaim a procured interest in things before I think about friends. Maybe the problem is that I'm thinking too much, but that just seems like a cop out. All I want to know is what makes me feel so distant from the world.