What keeps you going?

When you're really struggling and you just want to end it all... what helps to stop it? What keeps you going? The point of this is to make us really think what keeps us going and how we can use it to our advantage. Also, look at different peoples 'helpers' and maybe use those to help ourselves too. This may be stupid but i've been looking for some things that could also keep me going.

I'll start..

my little brother keeps me going. I couldn't live without him and it always hurts to think about him having to live without his older sister. also my aunt and uncle and to be honest, my pets. So i guess some of my family and friends keeps me going.

What about you?

 

My daughter
My cat
Fear of dying painfully
Fear of failing to die
The sun is shining
I know that people care about me

 

I try not to think about it. If I think about it too much I start to think that there's nothing much at all keeping me going. My final defense mechanism for those difficult points is simply: wait, don't do anything, mandatory cool down period, no impulsive action allowed. That's all.

 

My fear of the unknown after death and my sisters. I love my sisters more than anything in this life and I couldn't do that to them.

 

The only thing that keeps me going is the fact that I'm too much of a wimp to go. Through with it. This world thinks its a game just to see how low they can get me and it knows thatnim not gonna do anything but sjuffer. More and more every day. I hate it sooo much I wish that after a I g to bed tonight I just won't wake up

 

My mum. And the rest of my family, but especially my mum. I've seen her after my previous attempts, and I know how much it hurts to live through the suicide, or even the attempted suicide, of someone that you love. I know that my mum loves me far too much and for me to kill myself would destroy her, and then destroy my whole family, as she holds us all together. Sometimes I hate her for making me stay, but I love her too much to hurt her this way.
I wish that I would die in an accident, or could make it look like an accident, so she wouldn't know i had meant to kill myself.

 

my soulmate x
tho i feel i may have lost him.

 

at the moment my cat, how sad...until two years ago i always thought depression and suicidal thoughts were for the weak, boy how my opinion has changed. Kids all grown up, lost my love, losing my home, debts i cant pay, job looking shakey, lonely and tired, the silence deafens me, thank god for my cat.

 

What kept me going until most of the depression faded away: different things at different times.

the meds and therapy helped for a while, maintaining the hope that my condition could improve.
my familly
my husband
my pets
the tiny moments of grace when I could enjoy life again: apple trees blooming in the spring, a great meal shared with good company, a good book or movie, etc...

 

previously it has always been alcohol or drugs for me although this is taking its toll on my mental and physical health, and also not working anymore. now i am trying to look toward nature for reasons to carry on. things that live can be the best advert for life

 

My best friend/boyfriend
My deceased dog (he saved my dad's life physically, battled cancer)
My older brother
My art
The unknown of death.