What Led You To Consider Suicide?

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Scum

Well-Known Member
#21
Like eating unhealthily? I'd do that myself, I love food, but I think the way you'd die from it would be pretty bad, like heart attacks and stuff. :sad:
no, not like that at all. I have been sectioned for using this method before. They caught me at a time when I could have dropped dead at any moment. Now I have had to start again.

And helpless, thank you. I have enjoyed our chat tonight :D but like I said, you don't know me, but I really do appreciate the compliment.

I do feel we have hijacked this thread though, so lets leave it for the purpose it was intended, lol
 
#22
Ok here goes-
Ok, In the middle of the 6th grade, I transfered to a new school. At this school I was in a split class of 5/6. I was friends with 95% of the guys in my class, and i didn't get along to well with the girls, well bcuz of Eddy The Yeti. She was a fat, rude, horrible, bullying, babbling idiot girl that intimidated the rest of the girls ito being her pals. I being the new kid, and i was friendds with all the guys and such. She decided she didn't like me at all.
At this same time was when my dad was starting to 'punish' me more violently along with my mom. Well I had spent 2 years at a 'tuff' school, and i had learned how to fight. Well after spending 2 years of getting into fists fights ith this girl, i gave up. She'd hit/slander me, and i'd take it, but after a while i'd stand up for myself which landed me in 'DT' all the time. around the midle of the 8th grade. I had become a capital biotch towards her, while glad to have my guy friends back in my class. One day, she started cussing and twrowing things at me ( a dictionary, some pencil cases and such) and i called her a capital barbie and told her to f*** off with the backing up of J, and MJ and JM. Well the principle once again got mad at me for 'initiating' it, and i was given DT for a week. The final straw was when, while i was reading a book at the blue table. My teacher on the other side sorting the playing cards, The Yeti sat down in front of me. "You're in my spot B****"she barked at me. i said "Umm, I've been sitting here for over an hour"She got mad and punched me in the face, then ran off and nearly got ME expelled. While she was gone i took my math ******* and started slittiing my wrists in the hidden corner. One of the gr.7 girls saw me, after wondering where i'd gone, and freaked. There had only been 10 kids in the class that day so i thought it was safe. and with that and my abusive parents, and what HE did to me. nothing really bad, but on top of everything, what 3 guys did to me, not j, mj, and jm. i couldn't cope and i turned to that and pill popping, and starving myself.

But thanks to the aid of my 3 close guy friends in the new city i live in, i'm recovering though i do have very minor slip ups, biut not as frequently anymore.
 

TDZ

New Member
#23
I'm mother to 2 teenage girls, and, according to them, not a very good one - tho I bust my ass trying to do everything I'm supposed to do. I'm an exhausted self-employed worker who doesn't make enough money and will not be able to retire in 12 yrs, so will have to work til I drop in the traces... not a pleasant prospect.:sad:

What I DON'T do is... whatever I'm supposed to do to be a fully-realized human being. I don't do very well as a mother and will lose my youngest in a few months when she rejects me and moves in with her dad.

just too tired to explain anything, suffice it to say that I'm not doing very well at anything right now, and forever regret my bad choices in the past... which is why I'm stuck in this mess now...

least
Alot of teenagers hate their parents and as you dont make much money im guessing you cant provide every luxury they ask for, dont let it get to you its just a thing teenagers do and when they grow up they will appreciate how hard you worked for em and love you for it :D
 

TDZ

New Member
#24
Ok here goes-
Ok, In the middle of the 6th grade, I transfered to a new school. At this school I was in a split class of 5/6. I was friends with 95% of the guys in my class, and i didn't get along to well with the girls, well bcuz of Eddy The Yeti. She was a fat, rude, horrible, bullying, babbling idiot girl that intimidated the rest of the girls ito being her pals. I being the new kid, and i was friendds with all the guys and such. She decided she didn't like me at all.
At this same time was when my dad was starting to 'punish' me more violently along with my mom. Well I had spent 2 years at a 'tuff' school, and i had learned how to fight. Well after spending 2 years of getting into fists fights ith this girl, i gave up. She'd hit/slander me, and i'd take it, but after a while i'd stand up for myself which landed me in 'DT' all the time. around the midle of the 8th grade. I had become a capital biotch towards her, while glad to have my guy friends back in my class. One day, she started cussing and twrowing things at me ( a dictionary, some pencil cases and such) and i called her a capital barbie and told her to f*** off with the backing up of J, and MJ and JM. Well the principle once again got mad at me for 'initiating' it, and i was given DT for a week. The final straw was when, while i was reading a book at the blue table. My teacher on the other side sorting the playing cards, The Yeti sat down in front of me. "You're in my spot B****"she barked at me. i said "Umm, I've been sitting here for over an hour"She got mad and punched me in the face, then ran off and nearly got ME expelled. While she was gone i took my math ******* and started slittiing my wrists in the hidden corner. One of the gr.7 girls saw me, after wondering where i'd gone, and freaked. There had only been 10 kids in the class that day so i thought it was safe. and with that and my abusive parents, and what HE did to me. nothing really bad, but on top of everything, what 3 guys did to me, not j, mj, and jm. i couldn't cope and i turned to that and pill popping, and starving myself.

But thanks to the aid of my 3 close guy friends in the new city i live in, i'm recovering though i do have very minor slip ups, biut not as frequently anymore.
good to hear your back on track. There r people like that in this world and all you have to do is put up with them, dont destroy yourself to get back at them cuz your only gonna hurt yourself and let them win
 
#25
For me it is something i have thought about since i was in my teens but just a random thought no real plan or effort was put into it. However i recently had a experience that made me realise exactly how pathetic a person i truly am. I have no friends no job no education that would secure me a job besides serving other people food or cleaning up after them. My family is completely fragmented i wouldnt even call it a family. I ruined the greatest thing that ever happened to my by lying to the most beautiful woman i have ever met. It was after that event that i decided that suicide was the release i needed so i tried 3 times pills, hanging, and walking in front of a bus. I was found after taking the pills and the hanging didnt go as planned the thing i tied the rope to broke and the bus i just stood there looking at it as it went past. So now im doing it the easy way ive increased the amount of alcohol i drink to epic proportions my liver is already in bad shape and i smoke about 30 or so cigs a day it will take awhile but i know is definate that this will kill me and give me what would be considered a natural death which should make it easier for my family to deal with.
 

Ruby

Well-Known Member
#27
I see suicide as the only option. Even when I'm feeling ok, I still have suicide in the back of my thoughts. I see no hope, no future. I'm terrified of living. Visualing myself alive in a few years time makes me feel physically ill. I know that I've failed life and I have no purpose in being on this earth. The last three years have been so difficult; I'm actually suprised that I pulled through. My worst nightmare is ending up in a psychiatric hospital again, but instead of making me feel optimistic and willing to improve it makes me think, ''Ah, that'll give me reason to make sure I actually die this time''. I appreciate that I have a very pessimistic view on life and I honestly can't help that. I guess the word that I'm looking for is 'depression'.
 
#28
I don't know, really, but I guess it was because there's nothing than can reach you any more in death. All the shit that causes your life to go down the pan like mine did can't follow you into death. It's an escape route, and a reliable one, because nobody can drag you back once you've done it.
 
S

ScreamingMonsters

#29
I don't know, really, but I guess it was because there's nothing than can reach you any more in death. All the shit that causes your life to go down the pan like mine did can't follow you into death. It's an escape route, and a reliable one, because nobody can drag you back once you've done it.
it's true no one can hurt you once you are dead only u go into that hole in the ground and only u stay there u can be left un touched for eternity
 

Scum

Well-Known Member
#30
I don't know, really, but I guess it was because there's nothing than can reach you any more in death. All the shit that causes your life to go down the pan like mine did can't follow you into death. It's an escape route, and a reliable one, because nobody can drag you back once you've done it.
No one actually knows whether or not it is an escape for that very reason. Death could be far worse, it could take all your problems now and add more, no one knows because, like you said, no one can come back.

People idealise death as an escape, but really no one knows what death holds.
 
S

ScreamingMonsters

#31
No one actually knows whether or not it is an escape for that very reason. Death could be far worse, it could take all your problems now and add more, no one knows because, like you said, no one can come back.

People idealise death as an escape, but really no one knows what death holds.
it is an escape but I see your point that death may just be an add on because if u regret it as a spirit you can't undo it
 

Scum

Well-Known Member
#32
it is an escape but I see your point that death may just be an add on because if u regret it as a spirit you can't undo it
I would say more of a change, than escape, but a permanent change that can't be reversed if it is wrong, or worse, or whatever. But hey, that's just my opinion on it :)
 
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