What scares you about relationships?

#42
I'm very sorry for you! It is important to understand that Neither with a partner, nor with friends, nor at work, you can accept absolutely everything.
It is necessary to show the will and take responsibility for your life. Do not forget that you are a free person, and no one can impose a certain type of behavior on you or choose your environment for you. I was helped to believe in myself again by online dating. I met a woman I've been dreaming about all my life who is not characterized by toxic manipulations. Try, and you first learn to communicate with the opposite sex online again.
 
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#43
What scares me the most about relationships in general or trying to start new ones, is I feel I always end up giving more than I take back, which is draining. Like the other person is completely oblivious to it. Also not having the ability to be yourself, to fake it just so they don't think you're a freak. For example, I'm not a very sexual person and felt I've had to hide that fact from just about everyone I've met in my life experiences, young or old. Friends, bosses, co-workers, family, those I've had interests with, etc. I don't like putting up with perpetual rudeness also, I don't do those things(at least I don't think I do), why do you not care when you should?

I've lived in my nice, comfortable, safe, boring, lonely, predictable bubble for about the last four years now, and I ponder which is actually the better of the two; staying in the bubble and not being hurt, yet slowly rotting in my cell while I just become numb to everything around me? Or risking being hurt again trying to start a new relationship, yet risk is the only way to know what could have been? For now I don't know, but I lean towards the bubble because there I can 100% be myself, there is no argument, there is no "I'm not good enough or a freak" feeling, there is no false hope. There's also very little life, unfortunately. Well, I do have a plant...
 

The Undertaker

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#45
A lot scares me if I'm honest but unsure how to actually speak about them is another thing, I have Autism so sometimes I'm not that good at chatting and so on, but there is a few fears of mine that I'm not sure if I spoke to them about if relationship would fail or not
 

Witty_Sarcasm

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#50
All I do is get hurt, no matter how much I think I can trust someone. And this is why I need to stop setting myself up for pain and stop trying to connect with people altogether.
 

The Undertaker

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#53
I just wish it didn't turn out exactly the same all the time. Me trusting people and then they use it to take advantage of me.
It happens to me all the time, me personally without sounding misogynistic or sexist and all I feel there is a good percentage of women (probably men in women's view) don't focus on personality as the "prior" thing they want in a partner, I've been declined many times by many women for being open about my Autism and when they ask if I'm still a Virgin I'm honest and say yes, not that they believe me but it's the truth, and most women I come across are sex driven sex focused and just ain't interested in someone as a Virgin partner.

Prior to me joining a woman told me "women of certain ages don't want to teach Virgins on how to have sex with them" so I don't think I'd get a partner because I'm 31 I'm not wanting a young 20 year old I get attracted to older aged women like mid 30's early 40's

Even at that, intimacy aside, most people I come across don't focus on what one can do they focus on what they can't do and then are so quick so judge, that is how I personally view the world.
 

Witty_Sarcasm

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#54
It happens to me all the time, me personally without sounding misogynistic or sexist and all I feel there is a good percentage of women (probably men in women's view) don't focus on personality as the "prior" thing they want in a partner, I've been declined many times by many women for being open about my Autism and when they ask if I'm still a Virgin I'm honest and say yes, not that they believe me but it's the truth, and most women I come across are sex driven sex focused and just ain't interested in someone as a Virgin partner.

Prior to me joining a woman told me "women of certain ages don't want to teach Virgins on how to have sex with them" so I don't think I'd get a partner because I'm 31 I'm not wanting a young 20 year old I get attracted to older aged women like mid 30's early 40's

Even at that, intimacy aside, most people I come across don't focus on what one can do they focus on what they can't do and then are so quick so judge, that is how I personally view the world.
I don't think there's anything wrong with that and they shouldn't reject you because of that. It seems like people like to focus on shallow things instead of actually getting to know someone.
 

The Undertaker

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#55
I don't think there's anything wrong with that and they shouldn't reject you because of that. It seems like people like to focus on shallow things instead of actually getting to know someone.
That is what I feel is happening, shallow minded people and not having a fair chance at a normal life is what has led me to negative thoughts and so on and when researching on methods I came across here
 

Witty_Sarcasm

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#56
That is what I feel is happening, shallow minded people and not having a fair chance at a normal life is what has led me to negative thoughts and so on and when researching on methods I came across here
People seem to really care at first, then they get sick of me for whatever reason. I'm not good enough and people never fail to remind me of that.
 

Witty_Sarcasm

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#58
I don't understand what is so bad about me that I always get rejected. Is anyone able to see something that I can't?
 

The Undertaker

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#59
I don't understand what is so bad about me that I always get rejected. Is anyone able to see something that I can't?
Truth is unless you've done something spectacularly wrong then there is nothing wrong with someone, spectacularly wrong meaning intentionally hurt a kid or intentionally harmed anyone without good reason, those sorts of people need rejecting
 

Witty_Sarcasm

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#60
Truth is unless you've done something spectacularly wrong then there is nothing wrong with someone, spectacularly wrong meaning intentionally hurt a kid or intentionally harmed anyone without good reason, those sorts of people need rejecting
Well I never intentionally hurt people and feel bad if I even do it on accident. I just blame myself whenever I lose someone.
 

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