What should I do?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by SAVE_ME, Sep 2, 2009.

  1. SAVE_ME

    SAVE_ME Well-Known Member

    I've been debating whether or not to have a chat with my ex lately. You see, I'm off to Uni in a few weeks, moving to the halls of residence this Saturday, and our situation is a little....well...umm....difficult.....we're not actually officially in a relationship with each other, but a few months ago we both admitted to still having feelings for each other. We decided to wait til/if we ever meet each other though to become an item again. But we still kinda act like we're in a relationship. I'm just worried that if I meet anyone at Uni or in the halls or w/e, then I'd have to let her down. I know she hurt me and I said all these things about her but that was a year ago now, and I was hurt and upset back then, but I would never wanna put her through what I went through. I mean, if someone came along I couldn't just say "oh sorry but we can't be together cause there's this girl over in the US and we may/may not become a couple if/when we meet in person"....that wouldn't seem fair. But at the same time I wouldn't wanna let my ex down either....it would kinda seem like cheating even though we're not actually in a relationship with each other atm....more like really really really close friends....I dunno what to do....
     
  2. SAVE_ME

    SAVE_ME Well-Known Member

    Oh yeah, forgot to mention my ex and I were long distance.
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I would be upfront with her from the get go Tell her your friendship means alot to you but you will be seeing others at University as well and she is to do the same. Honesty from the start so she is prepared if you do meet someone.
     
  4. A_pixie

    A_pixie Well-Known Member

    Don't ignore her, but dont get into contact with her too much either, maybe you both need some time to think, some closure?

    Plus, not being in each other's faces a lot takes a LOT of pressure off, clearing your heads a little.

    Above all do not stress, stress never helped anybody make a sensible descision. Avoid panicking at all costs, regardless of who you meet.
     
  5. SAVE_ME

    SAVE_ME Well-Known Member

    mmhmm, I think I do talk to her way too much....there'd be times where I have a bit of a break from coming online and force myself to give her some space, but then I end up finding myself slipping back into the same old pattern of talking to her just about every day.

    I love her, I really do, and I would like to meet her and have a proper relationship, but if someone comes along before then, I couldn't just blow them off cause it wouldn't seem fair.

    Hell, maybe I'm getting ahead of myself here. Might never happen but I'm trying to prepare myself just in case. I dunno...I worry about things before they even happen sometimes.