What should I do???!!!!!!

[Eric G]

I have been suffering from deep depression for a long time now, like a few years. I become very lonely because I have no friends and I live by myself and have no one to talk to. Sometimes the loneliness really gets to me, well allot of times really. I have cut myself a few times, and I xxx a few times too. Each time I call 911 to take me to the hospital. They take me to the nearest hospital ER and after a few days I am sent to the big mental hospital or to a unit for therapy.

Today, I called 911 and told them I have been xxx for the past 3 days so that I would just sleep all of the time so that I would not feel lonely and depressed, every time I wake up I just take

They sent the police to my house. Four big officers came and told me that I could not be using them as a taxi service. They took about forty minutes telling me they had more critical things to take care of than to come to my house to take me to the hospital. They asked me if friends and family could take me to the hospital because I had called them a few too many times and they just could not continue to be a taxi service for me to go to the hospital, and unless I were near death it really was not a suicide.

I don't know what to do. I am 23 years old and I have been mentally ill since I was 14. I am under a psych doctor's care and I take 3 different meds for my OCD and Asperger's. But my doctor told me on my last visit which was Wednesday that no pill will take away the feeling of loneliness.

Who am I supposed to call when I feel suicidal? The police told me very clearly not to bother them again. I don't have any friends and I don't know how to drive. My mom's car is broken and my dad works 10 hours a day. For today I will wait for my dad to come home from work, if I don't decide to over dose or cut myself while I wait for him.

But what I am supposed to do? I need to know what to do?!!!! I don't mind calling and asking for help, but I need to know the right people that I should be calling. I thought it was 911 I was supposed to call because whenever you call a hospital or a doctor a recorder comes on and says, if this is an emergency please hang up and call 911. But when I did that today, and the police came....they really got angry with me and screamed at me not to bother them anymore!!!!!!

I don't know what to do!!!! Somebody please give me some kind of advice on who I should call. I don't want to die, but sometimes it seems like the best thing for everyone.

Eric

 

[Sadeyes]

How far are you from the hospital? Can you walk into the emergency room yourself? or is there a doctor nearer to you that you can see?

 

[Mikeintx]

Have you tried some of the suicide/depression support phone numbers. Can you try to find some support groups in your area maybe to help with the lonliness? Take care.

 

[Cpt-Fantastic]

especially with asperger there is a risk of over-doing things, patterns that are difficult to break out of. the current pattern that you have seems to be a destructive pattern, try to change it with a better one. maybe with the help of your doctor. it seems that you are looking for a friend, you see the cops as your friend so you keep calling them. they are indeed your friend but they are busy people, what about calling a suicide hotline when things get too much to bear, but what would really help is if you made new friends, do you have any hobbies? if you like chess you could join a chess club or something? and your daily activities, do you have a job? a job means colleagues, despite popular belief, there are nice collegues that will become your friend, ask them to hang out or something, and if you're feeling really alone, what about calling an escort girl?

 

[jxdama]

i wish you luck eric. i feel the same as you.