4 years ago, i was raped by my stepmom's son. thursday night he was visiting, and despite my efforts to stay as far away from him as possible he ends up trying to do it again. i had came back from a party and was totally wasted, as much as i tried to push him off of me, since i was so drunk and disoriented i couldnt do much. but here's the weird thing; after like, 20 minutes, i started to LIKE it. i actually got into it and started WILLINGLY have sex with this derranged evil asshole. this bastard that raped me 4 years ago, of whom i dispise almost more than ANYONE in this world, was actually turning me on. when i think of this, i actually get nauseous. it upsets me, and pisses me off. i read online that those who are sexually abused as children, when they get older they sometimes tend to get aroused by re-enactments, or bizzare fantasies involving the abuse or become sex addicts and etc. but i've NEVER been into that kind of stuff... EVER. to be honest, i'm scared of it. i dont even do handcuffs, i m ean it freaks me out more than anything... i dont understand, why, WHY am i like this? i just really dont fucking understand... has this ever happened to anyone else before?