what the hell am I still alive

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by morning rush, Sep 17, 2009.

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  1. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    I have no one, nothing to look forward to. What the hell am I doing still alive? I just dont get it...no one has time for me, no one cares...I just want it to end...
  2. Angelo_91

    Angelo_91 Well-Known Member

    hi im from canada too, what province do you live in? tell me about yourself? I can sympathize... just know some random guy out there who doesnt have the best life either cares somewhat.
  3. sudut

    sudut Well-Known Member

    did something bad happen to you?
  4. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    I guess I just feel so alone...and it's not like its going to change anytime soon.....
  5. Alliance

    Alliance Well-Known Member

    I wonder the same thing myself.

    I have no love in my life and no children. That is what I have wanted more than anything in this world. I'm 30 and I don't think it's going to ever happen. No one is interested in me anymore, and the love of my life dumped me years ago and I'm not 100% over her or ever will be.

    I am all alone in this world. Sure, my family care about me, but I think they would understand that I have wanted to kill myself for over 15 years now. Right now I'm at the lowest point I've felt in months. Even tried seeing a new girl, but I don't think that will work out either.

    Without love, what is life?

    I just want to let you know that I sympathize with you and am in the exact same situation. Can you tell me more about what has been going on with you, Living in my own world?
  6. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    You know I am here for you (cliche, but true)...you can pm me anytime. And you do have something to look forward to...your writing. It will come.
  7. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    I want to die...dying would be such a release, why can't I get the courage to do it...why am I so alone, no one seems to understand and I just am tired of living...tired of having to think and pretend that everything is okay because its not...I'm tired of going to the gym with my mom, I just want to curl into a ball and die...and at the same time I would like to have someone for me...I'm so confused....I'm tired of being torn up...
  8. necrodude

    necrodude Well-Known Member

    i know how you feel. i want to be dead, alone, gone. but i want somebody with me too. someone who wont let me fall, but who also wont pick me up unless i cant do it. but its not worth dragging anyone down with me... so that means, i have to go it alone, for as long as i can. theres a big difference between giving up, and accepting defeat. and that just makes things harder. but you shouldnt quit, just take some time out and carry on when you can. lifes not a sprint, but you cant sit on your ass and watch it go by cause itll drag you along for the ride. be your own clock. go at your own speed. just never give up
  9. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi limow,

    Your post made me feel sad. I feel the same way often. From your post,I assume that you have no friends at all? Have you tried making new ones? Do you suffer from anxiety? Please seek some professional help, it can and will get better :hug:
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