i've been thinking about killing myself for months, i attempted it a few times in the past ending up in hospital with a knackered kidney. i'm not entitled to help (i previously served in the army which is the reason my heads so messed up, and am currently awol). i was told by the assesors that i would not be allowed counselling because of my history in the army. i told the bloke im suicidel and need help with it, his reply was that its got nothing to do with him and i should sort it myself. at the moment i've just lost my job and have started to drink heavly. i can see no way out of this but to top myself. it is impossible for me to find another job and i'll probably be homeless within the next month. doe's anyone have any advice? i want to die, but don't want to screw up anyone else's life by doing it.