What to do

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by yesterday, Apr 26, 2009.

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  1. yesterday

    yesterday Member

    I came here to see if anyone has any idea's for my situation. I've had suicidal thoughts for quite a while now (I've gone as far as to research the means to and chosen a way). I used to cut myself, but for some reason don't now. I haven't told any of my friends, and I'm sure none of them will pickup on the pain I'm feeling (which really helps to depress me more). I told my father about my thoughts once, and it only made him angry. I'm afraid to go to a counselor, I know they will ask if I have thoughts of killing myself. If I answer yes, I have a scared feeling my job will find out (as they do, well, lets call them "back ground" checks). I'm afraid if they find out, they will think of me as mentally unstable and fire me. The added stress of losing my job could be the catalyst to push me over the edge. I don't have a wife or girl friend to talk to about this, no brothers or sisters, basically, I'm alone (which is the problem in the first place). I'm tired of selling my self that tomorrow will be better, tomorrow is just a day that never comes.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 26, 2009
  2. samba101

    samba101 Member

    Yeah it takes a while before you start to loose the thoughts of suicide, I've tried it oodles of time but they didn't work. I was suicidle off and on for about 15 years but now I've kind of given up the idea. I remember on my first attempt I woke up in hospital and broke down crying when I realised I wasn't dead, my father knew there was something wrong and took me there, all I can remember was hearing a voice asking me if I had taken something and alcohol and I remembered thinking to myself 'Don't tell them'. They gave me charcoal after they pumped my stomach out, all I could do when I was sent to the psychiatrist was break down and cry because I wasn't dead. I've tried other methods but I freak out about the dying part, one time I woke up after 2 days I had taken some pills and they'd knocked me out for that long. All I can say is the days are very long and there's no light at the end of the tunnel and then there a periods of time where nothing is wrong and life may not be great but it's okay. If your looking for a friend to talk to just pm me, don't know if you can do that here.
  3. yesterday

    yesterday Member

    Guess everyone else is asleep :awww:
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    First off Welcome to the forums!! I don't know how old you are so I am just winging it.. Seeing a therapist is like seeing a doctor, They can't repeat what you tell them..If you only tell them you have suicidal thoughts but aren't acting on them then you don't have to worry about them having you admitted to the hospital..You should talk to them about the underlying problems that lead you to think about suicide..If you are still a minor they can talk to your parents..You might think about having your parents sit in on a few sessions so they better understand the pain you are in..If you are older than eighteen then you don't have to worry about your therapist repeating anything to anyone..
  5. jere

    jere New Member

    I could be wrong, but I find this highly unlikely. That's got to be illegal anyway. If you want to speak to a counselor, I would suggest doing that.
  6. yesterday

    yesterday Member


    "The ethical principle of confidentiality requires that information shared by the client with the therapist in the course of treatment is not shared with others. This is important for the therapeutic alliance, as it promotes an environment of trust. However, there are important exceptions to confidentiality, namely where it conflicts with the clinician's duty to warn or duty to protect. This includes instances of suicidal or homicidal ideation, child abuse, elder abuse and dependent adult abuse."

    To answer your questions:
    -yes I am over 18
    -The background checks are legal because you agree to them before taking the job. The checks are redone every 4 years. These background checks are in place to make sure you wouldn't harm anyone, or give out harmful information. The thing of it is, I would never ever hurt anyone else. However, in my line work, all they need is an instance to show a chance of unclear thinking. Sorry to be so smoke and mirror's, but I really have to be careful with what I say.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 27, 2009
  7. yesterday

    yesterday Member

    I would also like to add that I have read several "self help" books, and read a lot of online pages (this is my first forum), all of which weren't very helpful. One book I remember stated that whatever you don't like about your life, change it. Thing of it is, the thing I don't like about my life is me. I hate how I let others take advantage of me (everyone says I'm such a nice guy, which I pretty sure is just code for "we can walk all over you"), I hate that I can't make any friends outside of work. I have tried SO hard to change, I have tried to stand up for myself, I have tried to meet new people. But it just never works, it's like there's something broken, and I have the feeling it's me.
  8. EyesOfTheWorld

    EyesOfTheWorld Active Member

    It is against the law for your therapist/counselor/psychiatrist or doctor to share any information about what you tell them/what your mental/medical conditions are, as long as:
    You are 18 or older

    You don't tell them you have tried to kill yourself, or plan to try, or have a plan etc. If the therapist asks about suicide you can tell them "i've thought about it but i never would" or something like "i could never bring myself to kill myself but i wouldn't mind if i got hit by a bus tomorrow". This lets the therapist know how serious your depression is without putting him/her in the position of having to report you.

    Do not admit that you plan to self-harm/cut/mutilate etc. They are obligated to report that. You can say that you have done it in the past but won't do it again, or that you have "thought about it but never tried it" etc.

    Never admit that you want to kill or do physical harm to another person. They are obligated to report this. It is ok to say "I hate so and so", or "i wish someone would knock his teeth out" (note: "someone", not "you")

    Never say you are planning to commit a crime, violent or not, but admitting to past crimes is protected by confidentiality.

    Otherwise, mental health professionals cannot by law share your information, no matter what your company's policy is, the law of the land trumps company policy. It is amazing what people can admit to counselors and not be reported. When I worked as a drug and alcohol counselor, people regularly told me about all sorts of criminal behavior- pharmacy robberies, heavy duty drug dealing, pimping, hoing, one kid even confessed to attempted murder. But since these things were all in their past i was forbidden by law to share the information, and i wouldn't have anyway.

    I have told my own therapist of some illegal things i may or may not have theoretically done in the past, and he doesn't care, nor could he report me if he wanted to. If i were to tell him i was planning to go commit a crime right after our appointment, that would be different.

    Just putting it out there that i am fairly knowledgeable about this type of thing (confidentiality laws and so forth, at least in the USA), being a registered substance abuse counselor (which as one would imagine also involves a great deal of mental health discussion), and also having training (but no certification) in general counseling/therapy, psychiatry, ethics of mental health professionals and so on. If anyone has a question regarding something like that feel free to pm me and i'll try to get back with an answer asap--if i don't it's because i'm not online, i do often go several days in a row without going online so you may not get an answer right away. But i will try to help as best as i can.
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