What to do?! :/

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by bring-a-smile-to-you, Oct 23, 2010.

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  1. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    I'm don't know what to do...I've been fine for a year, and then everything just goes wrong.

    I feel so angry and lonely and beaten.

    I snapped earlier, I threw some kind of frozen thing at my mum just because she said something I didn't like...this is wrong. SHES MY MUM. They're all better off without me..all I do is scream at them, but I love them so much.

    I have XXXXX. I stopped taking them...do I take them now? Do I end it?! People say it's selfish, but surely its not, because I'm doing it for the ones I love...so they can have a better life without me.

    What do I do guys?! Someone tell me, because I don't know! :/
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 23, 2010
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You take meds as ordered if they are not helping you go back to GP and get new ones Your parents will not be better without you they will suffer a lifetime of pain and i know you don't want that so get you stable okay.for them and for you
  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Taking that many antidepressants won't kill you it will make you sick.. It can cause liver and kidney problems..Please don't take them..You need to talk to your mom and let her know you need therapy to help you to get your anger under control.. It's tough to be young.. You don't forsee a future.. Kepp going to school then university.. You will make friends at university..You do have a future..Please hang on..
  4. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    I've been through all of the therapy. I was in therapy and all that crap from the age of 9. Things are just messed up atm...I've failed 4 times previously...so if I was to do it this time...I'd have to succeed. I just don't know what to do though. :/ I'm so confused atm.
  5. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    hey sorry this is going on

    yeah, maybe try to make the meds work out

    I would also recommend checking out acupuncture and chinese herbal medicine.

    dietary changes can help a lot

    meditation would also probably help you become a lot more calm

    hope you feel better soon
  6. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    My parents are Christian, they don't like anything like meditaion, acupunture etc.

    I'm feeling camler right now though. I don't mean to get angry. It's not me at all. It's like some cloud that comes over me and changes me, I get so angry, then I get really low and stay low, then I get angry again. It's hard to explain how I feel right now...

    I feel better if I punish myself though, ya know for being like this...if I punish myself I don't feel so bad.

    I must be chatting shit, I don't expect anyone to understand me, I don't really understand myself.
  7. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    you might try talking to the folks at your church. There are Christian forms of meditation, basically sitting and emptying your mind as a form of prayer.

    Folks at your church might also be able to persuade your parents that acupuncture is a medical treatment and is not contrary to church teachings.
  8. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Please do not hurt yourself...you are in enough pain...ppl have so many different attitudes toward treatment...is there a priest of someone you can talk to? Please continue to talk to us...and being angry is very understandable...big hugs, J
  9. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    Thankyou guys and girls. :)

    I'm just trying to get on with things as best I can. I went out last night after work, that helped take my mind of things. I have a friend coming over tonight too, and we're gonna go out for a bit again. It's easier when I can try and forget and concentrate on other people rather than myself. :) xoxo
  10. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Just remembering that these feelings come and go is what keeps me from doing anything. Tomorrow may be a better day and after all the bad days I have I want those good days.

    Feeling like everyone around you will be better off is the depression demons whispering in your ear. Fight them, your parents, friends, people that care for you will NOT be better off, if anything they will hate themselves for not being able to help you, they will blame themselves for not being able to see how hurt you are. Tell them, let them know what it feels like. They might not understand it, but getting it out there will help you.

    Im glad your feeling better, hope you have fun tonight with your friends.
  11. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    I hope you have a good day soon. :D You can always chat to me, I'll try cheering you up. Lol. And thanks, I'm sure it will be a giggle. (Y) x
  12. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Ive come to the reality that life is an up and down, down for a lot up for a little. Its the ups that Im living for.

    What do you and your friends do for fun?
  13. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    Erm, it varies I guess, it depends which friends I'm with as well. Sometimes go for meals or drinkies, other times the cinema, sopping etc. Two of my friends have horses, and so sometimes we go riding, I love it. :D Another one of my friends tends to have a movie night at least once a month which is always a giggle. :) Last night me and my friend were just hanging out, ended up going for a walk and ended up meeting some guys, and just had a giggle, although we both got in a bit of troube because we were gone for 3 hours! :/ Lol. What about you? Anything you like doing? XOXO
  14. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Sounds like alot of fun, sounds like you have alot of friends that care and want to hang out with you. Thats awesome.

    Me Im married, 2 kids so that takes up pretty much everything. We like to camp, hike, bike, those type of things. But one day me and H will get to go places and actually have date nights again.

    Glad you had fun last night, oops on the getting in trouble. Gotta watch that time, lol.

    Hope today is better than yesterday and tomorrow is better than today.
  15. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    I don't have that many, but the ones I have I love to peices...although they all seem to be changing, especially my best friend, I barely reconise her anymore...she's become the kind of person that she used to hate, it's getting hard to see...because I don't like that person, but I love her...does that make any sense?! :/ x
  16. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Yep makes alot of sense, we all change as we grow up, turn into differant people. I know Im not the same as I was even last year.

    To bad though, ever thought of mentioning what you think?
  17. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    I've thought out about it, but she just won't listen anymore anyway. It's all about her. So, I'm just going to let her get on with it.
  18. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    alot of times friends grow apart, my son is going through that now with his BF. Shame they had so much in common.

    But if you dont like her new type then you dont want to follow either.
  19. bring-a-smile-to-you

    bring-a-smile-to-you Active Member

    I just hope she see's what she's turning into. :/ Ah well, how old are your children then?
  20. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Boys-11 & 5
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