What to say/do?

[Matryoshka]

Well schools is coming. This is my senior year. Thing is, Last year I was feeling okay till mid September. That's until I had an appointment with the school's social worker. Basically I broke down crying and explained to her my depression,anxiety and eating disorder.

She recommend this place for me to go and get a therapist and psychiatrist. I had a lot of tests and interviews. I had a bad cold and was sick of a week and didn't attend school. So when I was feeling better physically, I told them I was scared and too nervous to go back to school. They tried to push me to go but i was persistent. I was able to get homeschooling and it lasted till feburary. It was really great. Then they made me go back to school for 3 periods only. I was pissed off because they were making decisions without me.

I didn't go the first two days I was supposed to come back. Then the school social worker came to my house and talked to me. It really bothered me that she came there. I didn't want to see her. I did however go to school that day. It was terrifying but eventually after several days I was a bit comfortable.

I'm extremely nervous about attending school for a full day. I got my schedule of my classes today in the mail. When I saw it I felt nauseous and staring to cry. I've been thinking about doing the homeschooling again but....I don't know if I'd be able to. I feel like my father, school and therapist won't let me, so I'm afraid to say anything. I have an appointment with my therapist tomorrow morning and I haven't decided on the right words to say.

Should I try to go to school or go straight to homeschooling or even have some school for certain subjects along with homeschooling?

 

[Speedy]

Hi Matryoshka,

I was a homeschool student my senior year as well. I've tried dual-enrollment classes (a few classes at the local community college) along with homeschooling (similar to the several periods a day of public school plus homeschooling you experimented with before).

One month into my junior year at a large public high school, I got a family doctor's note to excuse me and let me enter homeschooling. However, I'm not sure how homeschooling and requirements work where you live, as I am from the United States. What's interesting to note here is that my parents and therapist were opposed to me becoming homeschooled as well, but my parents eventually decided it was in my best interest after I broke down under the academic demands of school (as I was way behind in schoolwork and on my way to flunking out). If homeschooling is what you want, I hope your loved ones will accommodate your needs.

From my experience, what bothered me about homeschooling the most was the sense of isolation unless I made it a goal to go out and be with other people. However, being at school... while satisfying my "need" to be around others.. was stressful (schoolwork, the rigid schedule, being uncomfortable around others sometimes, etc.). I guess what I'm trying to get at is.. Whatever you decide to do, best of luck with your decision. Take good care. :hug:

Warmest regards,

Alex

 

[Matryoshka]

Thank you for replying. I feel that way about school too. I have close friends that I'm comfortable around. But other than that teenagers can be so annoying and everything that I feel its not worth going to school. I don't want to have to deal with their stupidity. Yeah school is also stressful, like with group projects. Usually I get stuck with the work. Homeschooling just seems better overall and I don't mind being alone. To me its actually comforting. I guess I'll have an idea when I talk to my therapist tomorrow. But I have more confidence to tell her about it thank you.

:]

 

[Speedy]

You're welcome. Hope the appointment goes well for you. :hug:

 

[peacelovingguy]

Some kids do better at home-schooling - its a fact!

On the other hand school is good for perhaps being around other kids and although teenagers can be annoying many are nice and many still just act like fools to impress other fools! Peer group pressure!

In school me and my mates just were ourselves - wore what we wanted - nobody cared about fashion. Sure there were bullies - but actually life is harder for them than it is for the 'victims' they tormented at times.

I hope the appointment goes well my man!

You seem mature enough to be able to study at home and succeed.

Good luck - I got faith in your academic prowess for sure.

 

[Matryoshka]

Thank you and yes I failed my math class twice. First and second year. I'm terrible at math. But when I was in homeschooling, I felt more relaxed and I could concentrate more without negative thoughts filling my mind. I ended up passing all my tests with great grades I was really proud of myself.

I'm praying it goes well too. I don't want to have to beg like last time for the home schooling. I was considering suicide and had been doing a lot of self harm back then and even tough they knew, they were reluctant on letting me leave school. Which made me furious but I was persistent on leaving the school. I still remember what the social worker said to me.

"Taking up homeschooling is not an option for you. You need to push yourself to come to school."

I'll never forget that and I want nothing to do with the social worker at my school. Even one of the interviewers at the program I go to,said almost the same exact thing. I'm hoping this time they can realize that the homeschooling was the right decision for me and will not stand in my way and quit deciding for me.