What to write in a note?

[PK71]

The person, doesn't even know me, well knows of me but isn't and wouldn't be sorry for the hurt and damage they have caused, in fact they'd probably revel in it. The person isn't a loved one. But still, is that what I've been reduced to? Wanting to physically harm somebody else for the emotional trauma they've caused me? I can't allow myself to do that.

The thing is though is that if I did work through this, like I have done so many times in the past, will it not just happen again? I don't even need to ask because I know it will. See it's not just this episode that has propelled me to suicide again, it's the thoughts of the next one too, do I really want to go through this again? The answer is a resounding no.

The one person I could reach out to and had reached out to in the past has played a massive part in this so no there is no support there for me in the real world from friends. The thing is is that say I did reach out to somebody and I still killed myself, that person would have to live with thinking they let me down and couldn't save me and even though that wouldn't be true they would still think it - it's bad enough hurting so many people like this without doing that to somebody too.

I don't want to justify the hurt, I just want to explain to my Mum, that's it.

 

[doityourself]

Call your mom, let her know your hurting and what your feeling. Dont give up the fight, dont look for things to go wrong because most certain if you think and say it will go wrong most times it does.

 

[IV2010]

PK71..how are you doing?
please stay safe..
keep talking to us ok..*

 

[Alliance]

I decided that instead of writing notes to everyone and forgetting a lot of things to write to loved ones such as family and friends that I am going to live an hour to a two hour video, explaining my views on life, philosophy, my attitude and my feelings for everyone. (sorry about the long run on sentence!)

I practiced on my webcam yesterday, while crying. Probably write down things to write and everyone I don't want to forget. Notes are not good enough.

 

[dav]

Why don't you tell each person how you feel about them and how you think about life in person? An intimate talk with those you love may give your life that little spark you've been looking for so long. Maybe it could be worth a try?

 

[DonnaJean]

I'm "checking out" on Saturday, I have a hotel booked and everything ready so I'm getting my affairs in order.
I need to write notes to my loved ones, I really don't want to as I know it will hurt to write them but not doing to would just cause them even more hurt. I will tell them it's not their fault and that they couldn't have saved me but what else?? I just want to tell them the right things to try and ease their pain.

Thanks xxx

Please disregard....EDIT due to realization this is an older post.

 

[IV2010]

do you wanna talk about what the latest trigger is?
sometimes it helps to tell someone..

 

[IV2010]

PK71..can you let us know how you're doing? It's Saturday here and I'm worried about you

 

[Dave_N]

I hope PK is okay.

 

[Juliaa]

I hope PK71 is still with us ): :hug:

 

[DeepEmz]

PK71 are you still here? please let us know, we are worried about you.

 

[Juliaa]

I just got an e-mail from PK71, and he's still here, gladly
:hug: