What would it be if I ceased to be me? Would you notice or choose to see? Would you question why I chose to die? Or would you just acccept with just a sigh? How would it be if I found a voice? If you cared or understood I have a choice, could I find a way to be happier more content. Round & round this mountain I circumvent. Shattered, exhausted, beyond tired, nothing left A shell, a shadow of my previous self, sad, bereft Nothing to give, nothing worthwhile to say When I am this sick it seems there is no other way. Could I help, protect you from the hurt & pain make it easier somehow without having to refrain from ending this existence, burdening those I love could I connect from the other side send care from above? Would I ever have anything worthwhile to say if I pushed through somehow & found a way to stay This is not how I wanted to be, I just long to be free free of the physical pain, sickness & burden I've seen That I have become, taking more than I am able to give Is it so wrong to yearn to be pain free, to feel better, to live? To have a connection, to feel that someone understands To feel that you receive the love I give without demands If I can't see it, does it mean it its any less real? Will I ever know, be able to give back, to truly feel like I am someone worthwhile, how would it be If I were to cease to exist, to cease to be me.