Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Christianv2, Sep 30, 2007.
Just curious, what would it take for you to want to live, or no longer be suicidal, if you are, ?
I'd fall in love with the best most genuine guy ever! I could trust him completely. We'd love each other for ever, he'd always be there for me
I'd live make home (before i moved) with all my mates and do what i used to do. And I'd be rich and wouldnt have to work.
I wouldnt have this blackness with me all the time, I wouldnt be depressed, i wouldnt cut, I wouldnt cry so much, Id be happy.
I wouldnt be afraid of new people, I'd enjoy life.
hahah as if that shit'll ever happen meh.
If the problems were solved, plain and simple. Namely, if I was able to become a different and better person, if I had something to live for, and if I was smarter (socially and intellectually). The first is impossible, the second has been a tough search turning up little results, and the third is an obstacle that I cannot find the path around.
But I know we have to fight the good fight, and to at least try to work through our problems before we let the end finally come. However, it remains a grim struggle with an ultimate failure always looming around the corner.
a time machine?
1- this cancer to be totally gone from my body and never come back so i would not suffer. thats the major thing that makes me want to die is because i seen my mom suffer and die and dont want that pain nor go through what she went though..
2 = David and Elaine to understand it was not my fault, that it was my niece who did certain things because she had gotten mad at me because i punished her for something and told on what she did to her parents = and to restore that relationship as a brother to sister in Christ relationship like God wants.. For them to love me like they said they did instead of lying to me about it.. for them to apologize for hurting me as well as let me apologize to them for getting angry with them when they hurt me.. for them to come face me face to face and not try and hide behind some third party like i am a total stranger to them after them telling me they loved me and thought of me as a daughter.. for them not try to hide behind a stupid phone by just phoneing me- that is not only rude but like its for total strangers which if thats what i am then they may just as well just stay away from me.. because their would be no sinceraty in it.. God dont work that way.. you dont phone God.. you go to him in prayer and talk with him one on one.. you dont hide behind a phone or third party neither, to do so your not really wanting to make amends.. at least thats what God tells me...
3 = my life and past with the many mistakes to be conmpletly buried and never thought about ever again, never throughed back up in my face, never mentioned, etc.. totally wiped out.. for people who knew me and my past to quit saying i am wanting attention, quit sauying i am just wanting drama, quit saying i am lying , quit saying i am stealing love, quit saying i am abusing others, you dont really know me, my heart, or my pain.. just stop and think about what you say not only to me and others but also to myself to stop and think before i speak also.. words do hurt and if someone says something hurtful to someone who is ion a lot of pain it can break them... be a little more kinder and dont judge people by their past cause unless you have actually walked in their shoes then you dont know if you would have did the same thing or not..
4 - for this world to be more kinder to people especially those who are hurting deeply.. those who seem different are really the most special in Gods eyes rather others believe that or not.. they are special angels..
5 = for me to be able to at least make and record one song to put it out there to the world and to donate all the proceeds from that song to the cancer society
okay i understand thats more then one but thats part of a bigger picture, sorry thats all i can say...
I'd have to be a totally different person spiritually, mentally, socially, and physically. As it is, I have no merit, no will or motivation, no redeeming aspects. If I were healed spiritually and mentally, the other two would probably come more easily. My mind is as horrible as it gets. I want to --won't say or be graphic-- but I want to hurt myself. I've tried punishing myself, to no avail. I used to go some days without eating and that did seem to alleviate some of my pain. Maybe I should try fasting again.
Almost died when I was seven months old. I'm only here because my mom wouldn't have been able to handle that so soon (a year before me, she had a miscarriage). That, and to be an example of how disgusting and revolting mankind can be.
Personally, to be financially stable and okay. To be able to live on my own without problems. To find a secure and safe job.
Good question... I'm not sure what I want.
If my desires were fulfilled, I'd probably instantly get new unfulfilled desires.
Social skills, a fit body, a different mind that isn't screwed up, financial freedom and love.
a miracle at the momet and winning the fight for my grandaugter:sad:
Not be bothered so much as I am with BDD and the past hurting me so much would be a great help.:sad:
I used to be suacidal/homicidal. (i'm not anymore) and I still hate life nor do I want to live (nor do I ever plan on killing myself). But what would make me actually want to live, is the chance to live. It seems that all we do is live to work, we are slaves to our economy. But what would actualy make me want to live is to be able to go on a real adventure. I'm not talking about rock climbing ro any of that "everyday is an adventure" bullshit. I mean the chance to live an adventure that we all want ot live and that we deep down long for, and that we have longed for sence we were children. Life's boring, and i think that's a major problem.
A wise statement that we should all remember when we think we know exactly what we want.
I don't need anything more in my life to want to live. My life should be great, but I can't stop the suicidal thoughts.
For me to keep fighting the suicidal thoughts, I need someone to show that they care. I can't fight this alone anymore.
As others, I think I would just have to be someone completely different. Body, mind, health, everything. I don't see how a person with all my problems could ever be even marginally successful in a society such as the one in which I live. I wouldn't call it completely impossible. Just next to impossible.
People can deal with a problem or two. Some people, indeed, overcome incredible odds. But when there is layer upon layer - one problem exacerbates another. When you hit a dead end every way you turn. And more importantly, when your own mind and your own body put up unbelievable obstacles, it gets really hard really fast.
Guys! It's not that we need to be SOMEBODY else, (I wish that's how life was but unfortinitly it's not and we have ot accept that fact) we can change ourselves! Everybody here has the capability to do it. Don't tell me you can't do it. Everybody can do it, they just need to want to do it? But what if you don't want to?
I tell you that there are steps to changing yourself even if you dont' want to and it's EASY! it doesn't have to be a painfull lesson by learning from your mistakes. You can take it small, and slow, and surely enough you were 50 steps further than what you were before, you just have to take those little steps day by day. It doesn't have to be this giagantic leap. You can start just simpially taking more B vitimins one day. Maby the next day you can try to smile at something...and if you can't bring yourself to do ti naturally, FORCE yourself to even if you dont' want to.
You don't have to go out and conqure the world all at once, you just have to do it a little at a time, and in the end you will conqure, you will overcome. Trust me! Next thing you know, You ARE that differen't person that you want to be. And when you look back in old photos of yourself, you'll wonder who that person was. And it starts with just one little step.
Nothing. Apparently humans have a set happiness level. People who win the lottery, their happiness shoots up, but in time it returns to where it was before.
It must be possible to change it. Just not for me. I should be happy, but I’m not.
So, there isn’t really anything much more I can ask for, but I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t matter anyways.
most people aren't happy with their lives...it natural. If everybody was compleatly content then they wouldn't try to improove themselves. But when we compare our lives ot others, ho wgood we think they got it, or their haves with our have nots. Everybody has their own set of problems. What we might consider a "successfull" person in a New York office, they might consider their lives a complete tragidy and how badly that they want out of their own lives, and wish that they could just have peace. What is "success" anyway? self satisfaction? Why can't success, or self satisfaction, be a relaxing calm saturday afternoon outside? That's what I consider success.
Something that would make me want to live?...
Being able to live one week, and actually make an accomplishment. And, by accomplishment I mean an event that made me realize what I can do with my life. Something that would create a cause to live. Right now, the only thing I have that's keeping me alive is the fact that I've attempted so many times and not a single success (obviously). I just got bored with trying to kill myself. So, I figure, if I want to die, why not just go through life until that point?
My life has been about helping others, but my mind has been about 'trying' literally to burden myself more and more until I break. I just want to put more weight on. I want the pain, the depression, the horror strangely enough. So, I go through my day helping everyone possible, the hobo on the street wanting money, the person at my school with relationship problems, hell even the guy in the McDonalds line without the money to pay. And then at night I come home, get my alcohol, my smoke, my Mp3 player, and waste the night away saying:
"That was a hell of a day God, I wish you could be in my shoes and feel what I feel this very moment. The want and need to die, but you force me to live. Thanks bud."
All I ask for, is an event that could at least help me with what I do every day, that's all...