whatever and ever..........amen

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by faeriegirl, Apr 1, 2008.

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  1. faeriegirl

    faeriegirl Active Member

    I am having a terrible day. I just want to go up to the roof of this godforsaken building and jump off. I hate my job. I just got back after being out for almost 3 months due to my last suicide attempt. All these bitches in here can do is give me wierd looks and whisper about me as they pass my cubicle. My disability insurance has been jerking me around for over a month. They owe me 6 weeks back pay but are trying to deny it. The employee relations dept is ignoring my requests for workplace accomadations. I got taken off all my meds suddenly because I developed an allergic reaction to one of them. I dont sleep anymore. I treat my DH like shit and dont do anything around the house. We are losing money vecause of me. I am dragging him down. I am a worthless pile of shit. I am so tired and I want out of this hellhole called life.
  2. Rammingstone

    Rammingstone Member

    You're not a worthless pile Faeriegirl. Like you said...you are just having a terrible 'day', it will pass, tomorrow will be better.

    People often feel uncomfortable around others with problems like ours. It doesn't mean they're laughing at you or singling you out.
  3. middleofnowhere

    middleofnowhere Well-Known Member

    I suspect most of us could write about similar situations and feelings. They're lousy. You're right - non-depressed people don't know anything about our psychoses, neuroses, med issues...as Rammingstone said, they probably aren't necessarily laughing at you. Or they might be, but I've figured out that it's their problem and I can't take on their problems on top of my own. On the other hand, there are caring, understanding people wherever the clueless ones are. Look for them.
  4. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    HI FG...BY NO MEANS ARE YOU A WORTHLESS PIECE...you are going through rough times...there is not a one of us who feels compromised when under such a dark cloud...please continue to tell us how you are doing...you would be surprised how many ppl can relate...and about the other ppl who are talking about you...I feel sorry for them...I cannot imagine living with such bad karma...keep your head up and try to get through this time...PM me if I can help in any way...big hugs, J
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