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What's going on here?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Madam Mim, Nov 19, 2011.

  1. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    My best friend is bi, I'm straight. I've always known she's fancied me, she's open about it but also always said nothing could happen even if I wasn't straight because it might ruin our friendship. But somehow we ended up fooling around. Well, it was her doing the actual 'fooling'.

    And of course now I'm confused. Not that I think I might be into women, I'm not, and I don't believe this makes me bi or a lesbian, not that it would matter to me or my family/friends if I was. I'm confused that I let it happen, and although it actually hasn't changed things between us at all, I don't know what to do if the sitation arises again (which I'm assuming it will).

    It's completely unfair on her, since I'm not romantically interested in her, and I've told her this, but she says that it doesn't matter and that it won't hurt her. But of course it will, surely? And anyway, what am I doing fooling around with my best friend?! What's wrong with me?!

    Since she learnt about my relationships and problems with sex, she's been more forward, and says she wants to make me happy. Which it doesn't, I had the same problem with her as I do with men, even though I completely trust her. So surely I should be telling her that it can't happen again, shouldn't I?

    If that's so obvious to me, why don't I want to? Oh, it's all so messed up.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I think for your mental well being you should set those boundaries very clear yet again with your friend. A friend is worth so much more the a sexual partner i hopeyou can get through to her that this is too confusing for you and it is causing you some anxiety hugs