What's it all for?

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xan

Chat Buddy
#1
All of this... this struggling, the tests the qualifications and degrees... Is it really just so that I can earn more money later in life? I can't see how that can bring me happiness. And now I wonder why did I ever start this course, move away from the woman I loved and loved me so that i could, and now it's over and she's moved on and there is nothing I can do to ever get her back. Why do I bother getting up each day just to trudge through the same monotimy as the day before, the only thing i see in the future is more challenges, more tests, more work, more responsibilities and obligations. Why go out just on the off chance that i might meet a girl that could make me feel loved again, even when every failure, which is always inevitable just sinks me lower, makes me more depressed, and hopeless and less wanted by anyone... Why do I bother anymore?
 
F

Flatliner

#2
I would dearly love to go to university.I would love to become a doctor. That would make me happy. That's the point of college and exams and university. To become what you want to become. Not to earn money. Don't you have a dream of what you want to become?
 

xan

Chat Buddy
#3
I don't know, not anymore really, I rarely look into the future with such optimism... It all seems like so much effort and like I won't gain anything worthwhile from it in the end, nothing that will help me.
 

xan

Chat Buddy
#5
All my dreams and nightmares lie in the past and they all hurt, I know what I have to do, what I'm suppose to do, to try and make it better, it just seems like it won't help, i don't have the motivation or energy to look foward, to find something worth living for any more... perhaps I should just try and switch off emotionally for a while, give up hope and live like a zombie, maybe there is something better in the future but i'm not sure i have the strength to hold on indeffinately
 
F

Flatliner

#6
Everyone has some kind of future that's different from their present. That's the point of the future. Maybe you could try not to think about it for a while and then maybe it'll come to you in a moment of clarity what you want to do.
 
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