whats on your copy and paste??

Discussion in 'The Gameroom' started by absolution, Jun 7, 2010.

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  1. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    sorry if this has been done before lol but yeah what is on it?? :p

    mine is
    I know I need You
    I need to love You
    I love to see You, but it's been so long
    I long to feel You
    I feel this need for You
    And I need to hear You, is that so wrong?

    Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh.
    Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh.

    Now You pull me near You
    When we're close, I fear You
    Still I'm afraid to tell You, all that I've done
    Are You done forgiving?
    Oh can You look past my pretending?
    Lord, I'm so tired of defending, what I've become
    What have I become?

    Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh.
    Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh.
    Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh.
    Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh.

    I hear You say,
    "My love is over. It's underneath.
    It's inside. It's in between.
    The times you doubt Me, when you can't feel.
    The times that you question, 'Is this for real? '
    The times you're broken.
    The times that you mend.
    The times that you hate Me, and the times that you bend.
    Well, My love is over, it's underneath.
    It's inside, it's in between.
    These times you're healing, and when your heart breaks.
    The times that you feel like you're falling from grace.
    The times you're hurting.
    The times that you heal.
    The times you go hungry, and are tempted to steal.
    The times of confusion, in chaos and pain.
    I'm there in your sorrow, under the weight of your shame.
    I'm there through your heartache.
    I'm there in the storm.
    My love I will keep you, by My pow'r alone.
    I don't care where you fall, where you have been.
    I'll never forsake you, My love never ends.
    It never ends."

  2. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    oh i just realised, i cant copy and paste what ive got :lol!: unless im allowed to post links to porn :lol!:
  3. 1izombie

    1izombie Well-Known Member

    elephant porn

    .....er it's for research purposes... o_o
  4. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    remember rule 32 and rule 34 :lol!:
  5. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    I could have done a lot for you
    Nothing was left for me to do
    Ah I'm always late, I let you go
    You always said it's rock 'n roll
    Life is battle, fight and grow
    Flash back, I loved your flavour
    I remember
    I know we could shine like the starlight
    I wish that we could aim the sky again
    I know we could dream for tomorrow
    To share the long forgotten glamorous days
    Ah glamorous days...
    I won't be sleeping!

    ~engrish song lyrics that I've been planning to re-write properly... go figure
  6. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    = [[Rules of the Internet


    -x+2^3. Do not look at rule 666-B. EVER. </math> i. You can't the square root of a negative integer.

    -8. combo breaker i am the combo breaker. the combo breaker is the law and the law is the law so who say you? combo breaker or combo breaker? combo breaker combo! breaker! combo breaker! so its now or never!

    -7. /b/ is not your friend. No exceptions.


    -5. No MOAR negative rules.

    -4. Rule 210. must be followed or you are breaking rule 100. No exceptions.

    -3. Every rule above 100 must be followed. No exceptions.

    -2. Never argue with the Ninja Unicorn- refer to rule 14.

    -1. Rule 0 does not exist.

    1. Do not talk about /b/

    2. Do NOT talk about /b/

    2.1337. You can't edit rule 2, newfags.

    2.13337. By editing rule 2 you will never have sex in your life. EVER. No exceptions.

    3. We are Anonymous.

    3.14159265358979323846... . Expect us.

    4. Anonymous is legion.

    5. Anonymous does not forgive, Anonymous does not forget.

    6. Anonymous can be a horrible, senseless, uncaring monster.

    7. Anonymous is still able to deliver.

    8. There are no real rules about posting.

    9. There are no real rules about moderation either — enjoy your ban.

    10. If you enjoy any rival sites — DON'T.

    11. All your carefully picked arguments can easily be ignored.

    12. Anything you say can and will be used against you.

    12-B. If someone states DICK or GTFO, PUSSY or GTFO, or any other variation as a response to TITS or GTFO, whoever stated their or GTFO first gets first picture of that which they stated. No exceptions.

    13. Anything you say can be turned into something else. - fixed

    14. Do not argue with trolls — it means that they win.

    15. The harder you try, the harder you will fail.

    16. If you fail in epic proportions, it may just become a winning failure.

    17. Every win fails eventually.

    18. Everything that can be labeled, can be hated.

    19. The more you hate it, the stronger it gets.

    20. Nothing is to be taken seriously.

    21. Original content is original only for a few seconds before getting old.

    22. Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality.

    23. Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality.

    24. Every repost is always a repost of a repost.

    25. Relation to the original topic decreases with every single post.

    26. Any topic can be turned into something totally unrelated.

    27. Always question a person's sexual preferences without any real reason.

    28. Always question a person's gender - just in case it's really a man.

    29. On the internet, all girls are men, and all kids are undercover FBI agents.

    30. There are NO girls on the internet.

    31. TITS or GTFO - the choice is yours.

    31-B. Refer to rule 12-B.

    32. You must have pictures to prove your statements.

    33. Lurk moar — it's never enough.

    34. There is porn of it, no exceptions.

    35. If no porn is found of it, it will be made.

    36. There will always be more fucked up shit than what you just saw.

    37. You can not divide by zero (just because the calculator says so).

    38. No real limits of any kind apply here — not even the sky



    41. Desu isn't funny. Seriously guys. It's worse than Chuck Norris jokes.

    42. Nothing is Sacred.

    43. The more beautiful and pure a thing is, the more satisfying it is to corrupt it.

    四十四。 Even one positive comment about Japanese things can make you a weeaboo.

    45. When one sees a lion, one must get into the car

    46. There is furry porn of it. No exceptions.

    47. The pool is always closed due to AIDS (and stingrays, which also have AIDS).

    48. A cat is fine too.

    49. One cat leads to another.

    50. Another cat leads to Zippo Cat.

    51. No matter what it is, it is somebody's fetish. No exceptions.

    52. It is delicious cake. You must eat it.

    53. It is delicious trap. You must hit it.

    54. /b/ sucks today.

    55. If you have time to make up new rules, you have no life.

    56. They will not bring back Snacks.

    57. You will never have sex.

    58. It needs more Desu. No exceptions.

    59. Fuck Gaston.

    60. It needs more pumpkin. No exceptions.

    61. Chuck Norris is the exception to Rule #63, no exceptions or else.

    62. It has been cracked and pirated. No exceptions.

    63. There is always porn of a female version of a male character (and vice versa). No Exceptions.

    64. Don't copy that floppy

    65. Anonymous is not your personal army.

    66. The cake is a lie.

    67. Anonymous does not "buy", he downloads.

    68. Milhouse will never be a meme. Ever. No matter what your post ends with. No exceptions. Ever. No.


    70. Do not talk about the 100M GET failure.

    71. The internet is SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS.

    72. Darth Vader is your father. No exceptions.

    73. If there isn't enough just ask for Moar.

    74. If you post it, they will cum.

    75. Rule 75 is a lie. OH SHI-

    76. Twinkies are the answers to life's problems.

    77. The internet makes you stupid.

    78. It will always need moar sauce.

    79. Ceilingcat IS watching you masturbate

    80. Interwebz177 did it. No exceptions.

    81. Anonymous is a virgin by default.

    82. Nobody tells the truth on the Internet

    83. Only clusterfucks start edit wars.

    84. All rules ARE true, including this one.

    85. Retarded rules are forbidden.

    86. The term "sage" does not refer to the spice.

    87. If you get pepperoni ever again, I swear I'll blow this joint sky-high!

    88. Anonymous rules the internet. No exceptions.

    89. Bruce Lee was an hero to us all.

    90. It's never lupus.

    91. There is gay porn of it, no exceptions.

    92. Chuck Norris is the exception to rule 91. No exceptions.

    93. Go Fuck Yourself. Anyone who tries to edit rule 93 can read rule 93 while rule 93'ing. No Exceptions

    94. Fagicorn rule 93'd while reading rule 93 to a gay bar and everyone in there was rule 93'ing and they all came in fagicorns face. we told you, No Exceptions.

    95. Anonymous did NOT, under any circumstances, tk him 2da bar|?

    96. If you express astonishment at someone's claim, it is most likely just a clever ruse.

    97. The government, The CIA, Everything is a lie.

    98. Only Zippocat is truth.

    99. All numbers are at least 100 but always OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAND.

    100. Faggotry will not be tolerated.

    101. You are never THE BEST suck at anyeverything, deal with it.

    102. You are made of fail and AIDS.

    103. That's no such thing as safe sex

    104. The internet is for porn.


    106. Rule 109 is true.

    107. "That's what she said" jokes are stupid No Exceptions

    108. THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!!!

    109. Rule 106 is false.

    110. If your statement is preceded by "HAY GUYZ", then you're doing something wrong.

    111. If you cannot understand it, it is machine code.

    112. What you click isn't always what you get.

    113. Gamestop does NOT have Battletoads (or N64 games). But ask anyway.

    114. Secure tripcodes are for fags.

    115. If someone herd u liek Mudkipz, deny it constantly for the lulz.

    116. Combo breakers are inevitable. If the combo is completed successfully, it is gay.

    117. Always go out of your way to make fags, dykes and retards feel uncomfortable.

    118. Newfags must be tortured to death. No exceptions.

    119. Only newfags like caturday, Bruce Lee, and Desu. Those who like any of those refer to rule 93.

    120. Nobody likes you.

    121. Co$ is the sworn enemy of Anonymous. It must be stopped.

    122. There is NO God here (Except Chuck Norris).

    123. 456789

    124. When Anonymous is surprised, bricks must be shat.

    125. If you have no bricks to shit, you are made of fail and AIDS.

    126. shaMTV must give Rick his award. No exceptions.

    127. No NewFaggots aloud.

    128. Everything you know is a lie, but all those lies are nothing. So by using the transitive property we can conclude that everything = nothing and if you add an integer (x) into the equation we can single anything out and turn it into a certain amount of nothing explained by this graph e = everything n = nothing

    | _ | ___/ \ e| ____/ \ |/ \ |________________________________


    As you can see, at a certain point of everything, nothing cannot exist. So in conclusion, I have no idea what I'm talking about.

    129. BOTS will be dismantled.

    130. Internet = Very Scary

    131. Whatever it is, pie is involved in some form. No exceptions.

    132. If it can't be killed, it doesn't exist. (Except Chuck Norris) No other exceptions.

    133. If you met your girlfriend/boyfriend online then you are dating a one armed lady hooker named Steve.(Unless there is webcam involved, then his name is John.)

    134. If it talks, you must shut it up.

    135. Myspace is for thirteen year old girls and people who fit the description of Rule # 133.

    136. _uck _ou_self solve it.

    137. Tuck yourself in. Is the answer.

    138. Rule 139 does/will not exist.

    139. Rule 138 is true.

    140. XKCD can explain everything. explain it or it goes.

    141. Godmodding is retarded. Seriously just accept your death.

    142. Just ignore him he will think you're afk.

    143. If you ignore her, she will bitch.

    144. People can't understand sarcasm.

    145. If you take it seriously gtfo.

    146. Stop giving the mic a blowjob.

    147. Regardless, if you get pissed on teamspeak there is someone that has muted themselves just so they can laugh at you.

    148. You don't get any cookies. No exceptions. So don't even ask.

    149. Brandon is God's son, making him Jesus. Chuck Norris has no son.

    150. You are not going to get a handicap so don't even ask. They will just target you.

    151. You will not get a free Xbox 360/Playstation 3/iPhone so don't even get your hopes up.

    152. They didn't call you retarded but they were thinking it.

    153. It's funny to pick on people's grammar no matter how good it is. No exceptions.

    154. The louder you scream at people the harder someone else will laugh.

    155. They don't have hacks, you just suck really bad.

    156. If you want to know who anonymous is then GTFO!

    157. Someone already did it better. No exceptions.

    158. It was in an episode of South Park. No exceptions.

    159. The more you deny something the more they are going to say that you are "something".

    160. Google ftw. No exceptions.

    161. The guy next to you in the library is always looking at what you are saying.

    162. The girl next to you in the library couldn't give a shit.

    163. There's a reason- you know what? Fuck it. If you can't figure it out, you seriously need to LURK MOAR.

    164. Refer to step 2 on Rule #165.

    165. Refer to step 3 on Rule #93.

    166. People who get depressed on the internet need a better use of time.

    167. Fleshlights are the answers to life's problems. No exceptions.

    168. If you pretend that you are drunk people will just think you're retarded because no one can act drunk on the internet.

    169? Nah I'll have 2 69s.

    170. None of us is as cruel as all of us.

    171. At any given moment, more birds could join, leave, or peel off in another direction entirely.

    172. Use inside jokes moar. It upsets users.

    173. STFU! Before i go chris brown on you!

    174. Only 4chan'rs unsuspecting victims hate Rick Astley.

    175. The talk page is for spam. Don't go there.

    176. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks children with the last name of Edgerton.

    177. Tropicana tastes like the rainbow. No exceptions

    178. Shadow sticks are fun to play with in the dark. Unless there are more than 3.

    179. Refer to all unwritten rules. No exceptions.

    180. For every life the internet improves it destroys 10 others.

    181. Anything that's good is a virus.

    182. We better start helping the earth, otherwise Al Gore will take back the internets!!! NO MORE BROADBAND! NO DIALUP!

    183. If i have 3 cakes and you have one cake, only here you have no cake and I have 3 ps3's

    183-B The cake is a lie.

    184. The only potty training videos allowed are ones that feature tigers and are japanese in nature (english subtitles are acceptable)

    185. The Internet and Golf are quite similar they both were invented for men to get away from woman, except the internet has porn.

    186. Newfags must be shot in the balls on site. No exceptions

    188. If none of these rules are followed/obliged to then Bruce Lee will donkey punch you to Uranus.

    189. Bukkake is not cool. Never was. Never will be. EVER!!

    190. The only good hentai is yuri, thats how the internet works.

    191. You will always forget to add an attachment to your e-mails.

    192. If you break rule 1 and 2. You will be rickroll'd in hell.

    193. If you break rule 188. You will be spanked by Barack Obama.

    194. If you break rule 2, Barack Obama will tickle your pubes.

    194-B. Rule 194 is true.

    195. People called Fred are just Fail. No Exceptions.

    196. People named Tyler are just win. No Exceptions.

    197. People named Matty are just sexy. No and I mean no Exceptions.

    198. If it's not on Google, It does not exist. No Exceptions.

    199. If it's not on Google, then you're searching with the wrong criteria, no exceptions

    200. Pictures or it didn't happen.

    201. Maths in failing: Win + Fail = Epicfail Fail + Fail = Win Win + Win = Fail Epicfail + Epicfail = Chuck Norris No exceptions

    202. Anontalk is a bunch of fags. No exceptions.

    203. If you run out of cookies, give apples, If you run out of apples, Give Spam. No exceptions.

    204. NEVER shoot anybody in the balls. No exceptions.

    205. All Americans are fat. No exceptions.

    206. Any breaking of pi will result in pi being broken. No one knows the consequences. You have been warned.

    207. Rules 1 and 2 are false. From now on, all rules must be about /b/. Unless they aren't.

    208. Rules 1, 2 and 206 are true.

    209. See rule 208.

    210. See rule 209.

    211. srt8 must not marry MITB. No exceptions.

    212. 4chan is funny. No exceptions.

    213. Your mother is behind you. No exceptions, unless she isn't.

    214. In case of an emergency, your emergency exit can be found in the top right corner of your screen. No, and i promise you, NO exceptions.

    214-B. except on a Mac

    214-C. Alt. F4

    215. Rule 213 is false. Do not click that button.

    216. 3, is the magic number.... 3, is the magic number.... NO EXCEPTIONS!

    216-B. 42

    217. Creator of 4chan is mentally Disturbed. No exceptions.

    218. Porn must only be looked at when porn is needed.

    219. Google is not a calculator


    221. RETARDED NEWFAGS,should always be shot without warning NO EXCEPTIONS!

    222. The game ended, wait a while before we start the next wave.

    223. Only faggots add rules that don't go along with rule 93 no exceptions.

    224. All rules above "PROFIT!" don't count. No Exceptions.

    225. The Simpsons already did it. South Park already did it better. NO EXCEPTIONS

    226. If a statement may be taken sexually in any way, then she already said it. No exceptions.

    227. Creed is the worst band in the world. No exceptions

    228. None of these rules apply to this wiki. No exceptions.

    228-B. except the ones about newfags editing the rules

    229. You never see the porn first, even if you made or drew it. No exceptions.

    230. Hentai is you friend. No exceptions.

    231. The number of friends you have on facebook does not indicate the number of friends you have in real life. No exceptions.

    232. You cannot control the person in charge. No exceptions.

    233. The person in charge only wants to make your life miserable. No exceptions.

    234. Rule 186 is the only exception to rule 204

    234. ????

    235. PROFIT!

    236. There is no more than 1 rule for 1 number. 234 is the only exception, all others can refer to rule 93.

    237. P30P13 WH0 U53 1337 5P34K 4R3 N07 1337.

    238. Every night when you are sleeping, Interwebz177 gives u pills that give you a boner then he sucks you dry.

    239. That naked picture you took whilst drunk has never been removed from the internet, and will remain on a 50yr old man's hard drive for as long as he lives.

    240. Rule 301 is false, it is occasionally Alex.

    241. Everything fun on the internet is either illegal, immoral or fattening.

    250. Additional Pylons are required. Always

    269. Yeah, finally...2 69's!

    299. This is blasphemy, this is madness. No exceptions

    300. 299 is a lie. This is sparta. No exceptions.

    301. This is the end of the world, no exceptions.

    302. 301 is a lie. The end is the beginning. No exceptions.

    303. o_O

    /¯/___________________________ _


    \_\¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ¯

    306. The lazah destroyed rule 305.

    307. Newfags will rape you so hard that Micheal Jackson will feal it in hell. No exceptions.

    308. the rules on 313 were watching the lazah as well, and have wandered off blinded refer to rule 313 for more details.

    313. Rule 309,310,311, and 312 tried to defeat the lazah, but got dazed with radiation and now can only see Ninja Unicorns, no exceptions

    314. The day that pi finally ends is the day that the world will end. No exceptions.

    369. Two's company, three's a crowd.

    370. Perl will NEVER be the best language, no exceptions

    371. Every time you throw an IntrospectionException an emo becomes an hero

    372. Attempting to post anything on the internet which defines the rules of the internet will result in an UserIsAnNoobException

    373. Exception in thread "/b/" internet.lang.Error: InvalidArgumentException:

    at Rules.main(Player.java:106)

    at Rules.main(Game.java:109)

    374. If you break rules one or two, you must compile and rule 2.1333371 and throw no exceptions.

    375. Some rules just dont make sense... follow them anyways. No Exceptions

    400. Gilmans law-any discussion on any site or chat room if given enough time with out invoking Godwin's law will eventually devolve into quoting Monty python

    404. This rule was not found.

    405. If you're wondering where the other rules went, check rule 404

    406. Everyone hates you. No exceptions.

    406-B. Everyone is out to get you. No exceptions.

    407. No one can destroy the metal. The metal will strike you down with a vicious blow.


    690. Wow is spelt with one capital when not referring to the game. No exceptions.

    666. Humanity is evil. No exceptions.

    666-B. You've lost THE GAME. No exceptions.

    777. Today's your lucky day.

    778. Andrew and William won the game. They are now apart of the game and have been freed from the games restrictions. No exceptions.

    867-5309. Jenny is not home, she will never be home. No Exceptions.

    999. ˙suoıʇdǝɔxǝ ou ˙ןıɐɟ noʎ 'sıɥʇ puɐʇsɹǝpun ʇ,uop ןןıʇs noʎ ʇǝʎ pɐǝɥ ɹnoʎ dıןɟ oʇ ǝɯıʇ ǝɥʇ ʞooʇ noʎ ɟı

    1001. Amount of uses for duct tape for now. more are being discovered.

    1337. Deleted. made by Newfag.

    2012. Science doesn’t exist, God doesn’t exist,Only Chuck Norris exists

    2013. Rule 2012 is a lie. So are the Mayans.

    5067. If you forget about Chuck Norris while on the Internet he may round house kick you at his time of choice.

    5297. Jawz, I is him and no one else is. no exceptions.

    9000. You must be strictly greater than 9000 to be over 9000.

    9001. It's over 9000. No exceptions

    9002. It's still over 9000, and always will be!

    9003. You will be molested this many times by newfags, especially if you edit this post no exceptions!

    9004. This is how many times I have killed newfags. Obey Rule 9003, or else! No exceptions.

    90210. This rule is shit, and so are you for thinking, "Oh, 90210, I love that show!"
  7. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I've sunk to a new level of boredom. I actually read some of that last post.

    *goes to find something productive to do*
  8. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    :rofl: alison dont admit that :p
  9. Infinite Sadness

    Infinite Sadness Well-Known Member

    Having narrowly escaped Lud and Blaine, the ka-tet finds itself in Topeka, Kansas, a ghost town depopulated by a superflu. So that they can continue, Roland must tell them of a time in his youth which helped define the man he has become. Before the tale is finished he must confront a man who may hold the key to the Dark Tower.
  10. texaskitty

    texaskitty SF Cat Lady Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I'm bored too, gah I read it all.
  11. Little_me

    Little_me Well-Known Member

    "Att välja en ras som passar kan vara ett svårt val, om man först har bestämt sig för att bli hundägare. Dessvärre ser man allt för ofta att vissa familjer väljer fel ras, med resultatet att hunden antingen blir missanpassad i sin miljö, omplacerad eller i värsta fall avlivad. De allra flesta som skaffar sig hund ska primärt ha en familjehund, "

    something about dogs
  12. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

  13. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    The requested URL was not found on this server. There are so many reasons that this might have happened we can scarcely bring ourselves to type them all out. You might have typed the URL incorrectly, for instance. Or (less likely but certainly plausible) we might have coded the URL incorrectly. Or (far less plausible, but theoretically possible, depending on which ill-defined Grand Unifying Theory of physics one subscribes to), some random fluctuation in the space-time continuum might have produced a shatteringly brief but nonetheless real electromagnetic discombobulation which caused this error page to appear. Or (and truth be told, this is by far the most likely scenario) you might have reached a page that we meant to create but didn't get around to it, since this year's April Fool's joke got hacked together at the last minute, more or less the same way this one did. And this one. And this one, and this one, and this one...
  14. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

  15. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Me to Alison... :eeek:

    Wayne..cop this..:mortdesinos:

  16. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    lol you need to look at my last 2 posts on this thread then lol they will BLOW your mind
  17. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    How to kill a living thing.
    Neglect it
    Criticise it to it's face
    Say how it kills the light
    Traps all the rubbish
    Bores you with it's green

    Hardens the heart
    Cut it down close
    To the root as possible

    Forget it
    For a week or a month
    Return with an axe
    Split it with one blow
    Insert a stone

    To keep the wound wide open

    - Eibhlin Nic Eochaidh -
  18. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    :loopy: :mortdesinos:
  19. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    1. No wasted beer in the name of humour.
    2. It has been made official that under no circumstances should the male have to pay
    for birth control
    3. If your best friend is dumped by a girl it is a 6 month waiting period till she can be
    touched. If he breaks up with her it’s a 6 day waiting period.

    4. If two or more males arrived at a party by a single car, and the driving male is
    hooking up with a girl, it is the responsibility of the other males to find other ways
    (The exception to this law is if the driver is hooking up with his own girlfriend, the law
    is then void and the driver still holds full responsibility of driving his friend’s home)
    5. Short shorts have been banned… Unless in a participating in a sporting event that
    demands shorter shorts. Also no real man should be allowed to pop his collar.
    6. Every man shall allow one empty urinal of separation in a bathroom with three or
    more urinals; law is void if there are dividers in between each urinal.

    7. If a girl and a guy are not officially dating then it can't be considered cheating.
    However...if the guy cheats with a girl that is less attractive to the one he is originally
    interested in then he is either... A) Drunk or B) Dumbass. This then gives the original
    girl the right to either get mad or laugh at you.
    8. No one should ever steal a man's alcohol from that man's cooler...this is the only
    law that suffers the penalty of death.
    9. When bringing condoms to a party it is a man's responsibility to pack two in his pockets and one in his car as a spare in case a friend is in desperate need.
    10. No heavy fornication in a friend's bed. Or just wash the sheets.
    11. No man shall every use a rolling backpack. If you can't carry the bag then you’re not a man
    12. If another man's fly is down, you didn't see anything and may not make a
    comment about it.

    13. When a man is borrowing a buddies tool or other equipment, if the borrower puts
    any scratches or brings it back with any noticeable wear, then he is required to do
    one of the following: If the item costs under 50 bucks, you are required to replace it.
    If the item costs over 50 bucks, you are required to give him a case of beer, because
    hey...who wants to spend more than 50 bucks on something that isn't yours.

    14. When your friend picks up a hot girl...however the hot girl has an ugly friend...it is
    only right that you operate as a wing man doing whatever it is you got to do to help
    your buddy have some time alone with the hot girl. As men we are obligated to
    sacrifice and pay it forward for each other knowing that the favour will one day be

    15. When calling shotgun, all riders of the car must be outside, and shotgun can only be called when the car is in view. Riders in the car are not allowed to run to shotgun and steal it before the person who called and deserves it arrives there. The driver of the car has no authority to decide on who gets shotgun. If a legitimate confrontation comes up where the rightful owner of the shotgun can not be determined then it will be decided by one round of paper rock scissors (with no shoot). If the two contenders tie 5 times in a row then the rightful owner of the shotgun is to be decided by a UFC cage match in which the first blood drawn decides the rightful owner of shotgun.
    Addendum to Man Law No. 15:

    If at any point during the process of determining the shotgun rider a hot girl hints
    that she would like to sit up front the driver has the sole right to declare her the
    shotgun rider and depending upon the situation may even deny rides to all other
    passengers. However, if said hot girl is an ex of any passenger they may overrule the
    driver's decision and make her ride in the back. Additionally, if all passengers happen
    to be female then revert back to original method of deciding shotgun rider
    substituting mud wrestling for UFC cage match. The winner then gets either a cold
    water hose down or shotgun the next ride unless the car is really shitty and the
    owner doesn’t care about muddy seats.
    16. It is PAPER, ROCK, and SCISSORS with no shoot. If you must say shoot, it has to

    be agreed upon by both men and a witness has to be present and somewhat sober.
    17. When toasting with beers you clank with the bottom.
    18. You poke it you own it.
    19. The head nod is an acceptable way to greet another guy when simply walking
    past. No words are needed to be said. An upward nod is for friends, a downward nod
    is for fellow men.

    20. If a man is on vacation to a state that does not border his own, or any other
    country, it is not considered cheating if he so chooses to engage in sexual activity
    with a girl other than his girlfriend. Although he should be fully aware that his
    girlfriend may not see eye to eye if she was to ever find out.

    21. A man should not masturbate more than 3 times in a day to insure being ready
    for any unknown or known late night action. Assisting Girls does not count… rule is in
    exception if male party is in a bet to set a record of number of times in a day.
  20. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    22. A man shall never wear any article of women's clothing (I.E … Girls Jeans/Pants!) unless they are the loser of such a bet… or if a man is figuratively in a girls pants… (Or any other article of clothing).
    23. No man in any circumstance, unless mocking a violator of this law, should pop his
    24. A man should never be denied the right to adjust himself or place his hands down
    his pants under any circumstances.
    25. Being a Pirate should be considered a Manly job because pirates get two types of

    26. All men must eat meat. A shitload of meat; if not borderline carnivore. For no reason should a man ever be a vegetarian, or eat sick shit like tofu. Also no man should consume any food with the terms "diet", "fat free", or any other healthy suggesting terms for the sake of "watching his weight" or dieting.
    27. Every man is required to learn some form of Poker before he dies.

    28. If a man ever does something wrong a simple "OOPS", "My Bad", or any
    variations of cuss words that get the point across will suffice, no need to say "I'm

    29. No man should ever hook up with his best friend's girl, no matter how hot she is. This is in effect while they are dating or "together." If they are separated refer to Law 3 for the proper way to handle the situation. (Side Advice: Less guilt is involved if she comes on to you.

    30. under no circumstance should any one man cockblock another mans attempt at
    getting some tang. Let’s just leave that up to the tangs fat friend. Please note that
    cockblocking will result in a suspension of your Man status and its privileges, and will
    result in the title Manbitch.

    31. Every man should watch sports center at least once a day, though multiple
    viewings are recommended so that one can hold his own in any debate on sports that
    may arise that day.

    32. Under no circumstances shall any man lay a hand on a female or a child in
    violence. Spanking of a woman's ass or pulling of the hair is permitted if done on
    request. Corporal punishment is permitted excluding obvious extremes. Punishment
    for the attacking male is that if other men see the assault taking place they having
    the right to take him out back behind a building and show him how to fight with real
    men. In this situation more than one man may be used in the attacking of said
    woman beater because he clearly doesn’t mind an unfair fight seeing as he was
    hitting a lady or a child to begin with. A call to the police is a very last resort and
    should only be used is said male is over 6' 5" 250lb. or an ufc cage fighter. A kick to
    the crotch is only called for in cases of rape. If it is merely a guy beating a woman,
    defenseless child, or elderly people then a legitimate beating is called for, but no
    shots to the crotch. If it is a case of rape however, multiple shots to the crotch are
    called for. The punishment must fit the crime and since rape is using that area of the
    body, it is ok to inflict damage to it.
    33. If a woman is present whether family or friend no man under any circumstances

    shall make their own food or pour their own drinks unless it is a special holiday such as, Mother's day, Birthday's, or St. Patrick's day or if the woman cannot keep up with the pace you want your drink poured. Law is void if significant grilling is involved.

    34. No man shall ever watch a soap opera ever! Period! If this law is broken, it will
    result in the lowering of status from man to Manbitch and the questioning of the
    liking of opposite gendered relationships.
    35. Women can't drive.

    36. In the court of Man Law the statement "I was Drunk" will have the same effect as
    an insanity plea (reduced punishment) in standard court provided the defendant's
    blood alcohol level exceeds .10.

    37. If any male is caught violating a Man Law in serious context, as a form of
    punishment he should be disowned of his manly name, only to receive the title of
    "Manbitch" from his peers and colleagues. Forgiveness is pending the severity of the
    broken law...or a case of beer to all his offended peers as a token of respect to what
    is manly...and what is not.

    38. Any man that is old enough and is not in the army should at least support the troops, even if you don’t agree with the war they are your country men fighting to protect you and you should show them your support
    39. No more crushing of empty beer cans or your forehead. Modern, thinner cans
    make the feat less impressive than with cans of years past.
    40. If you take beer to a party the tuck rule is in play when leaving, you may take one

    beer max, but only if the beer will fit in your pocket.
    41. Do not have a conversation at a urinal.
    42. A man will not live in his parent’s house past the age of 27 unless they are ill or
    he is in the war.
    43. All men have the right to remain silent when asked by a woman "do you like this".

    And the right to leave the room.
    44. Sex is more important then talking
    45. No man under any circumstance shall use lip balm.
    46. Grilling, regardless of weather, is always the first choice for cooking.
    47. No man shall ever own a dog smaller then a housecat
    48. Men will invite other men to Man Law
    49. No man shall ever turn down free beer because "it’s not their brand."
    50. No man shall be shamed if they are passed out with their shoes off in your place.
    If the person passes out outside of the house, then they are fair game shoes or not.
    51. It is acceptable for a man to publicly situate and/or scratch himself in the region
    of the gonads. If at a formal conference, then do so discretely. If at a football party, scratch away, just no handshakes.

    52. The morning after, if a beer has been left on the table, no matter the
    temperature, it is acceptable to consume this item with food, such as its counterpart,
    cold pizza.
    53. If you spill a man’s beer, you buy the next round/refill the cup.

    54. Nursing a beer is unacceptable. The bottle/can/cup should never reach lukewarm temperature with beer still in it. If you can’t drink it in said time, don’t open it. If you cant drink it in said time, your man status will be up for review.
    55. Always accept beer from a stranger, but only if unopened/capped.
    56. It is never a man’s responsibility to empty the trash while drinking. Beer cans

    may be staked or crushed while the bottles may be thrown into neighbour’s lawn.
    57. A man does not have to like another man to drink his beer. Beer is beer.
    58. It is acceptable for a man to break man laws, if no other option is humanly

    possible, in the pursuit of the opposite sex. His actions will be given leeway.
    59. The bachelor’s party is exclusively male. (except the entertainment).
    60. No man may ever sell a beer to a friend. It’s understood that said friend will repay
    beer with beer later. Under no circumstance may the replacement beer be of a lesser

    61. A man purse is still a purse.
    62. No man shall dance for fun unless it’s to increase his chances with a member of
    the opposite sex.
    63. Body paint is only acceptable on a man if it’s on game day and to support his
    64. No man shall bring a woman to the guy’s night out. This is punishable by verbal

    abuse for life.
    65. If you do not sweat, it’s not a sport. (People sweat during Beer Pong.)
    66. If a large snake catches a man off guard and bites, said man is allowed to scream

    67. No man shall wear a beret unless it’s for his military service.
    68. When lifting weights, it is acceptable for a man to wear compression shorts under

    the regular shorts. No man shall ever wear compression shorts alone.
    69. No man shall ever, under and circumstance, share an umbrella with another man.
    70. No two men are allowed to enter a revolving door together. Unless it involves a
    race were the winner receives a combination of the following: beer, food, sex
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