I feel sometimes that my brain is my enemy. I can never tell if my intentions are pure, or if I'm actually trying to destroy myself subconsciously. Who am I, why do I do such stupid, humiliating, and embarrassing things to myself. WHy do I hurt others? How do I know when I'm setting myself up for failure. Why can't I just be happy? Why does everyone believe in me when all I can see is this self-hating, self-doubting bitch who secretly wants everyone to see her for what she is. I don't even know what. I want everyone to have no expectations for me. I want everyone to lose interest in me so I can just stop worrying that I'm going to hurt someone. How do I know when I accidentally or purposely hurt someone when I can't even figure out my real intentions. I hate my brain and its fucked up chemistry. It feels like my worldview could flip at any second. I feel like everyone will find out that I'm a fake and a hypocrite. I just don't want to hurt anyone. I want to curl up into myself until I disappear.