As long as I remember I´ve had some kind of anxiety all my life since I was a kid. But its only the last 5 years I´ve become aware of my illness (depression and maybe some bipolar), accepted it and worked with it. Sometimes (like for the last 4 days) I just feel so tired of working and struggling with it!!!! When does it all stop and go away? Will it ever end? The dr and my therapist says that people do get well and "normal" from depression. But sometimes I just get so sick of this working and struggling and as soon as I do feel better BOOM I hit rock bottom again!! And everything just feel so hopeless like im wasting my time, energy and effort to get well!! Last night I got over the suicide state and feel pretty good today... but boy I was so close to end my life this time, I planned and prepared. What if this is the way for the rest of my life? Can anyone live with that for the rest of ones life???