i find myself at a crossroads. i dont want to be here anymore. the numerous medications since the age of fourteen, always being alone, having my older brother spit in my mouth as if i were nothing,, watching my mother beaten as a child, not having anything to look forward to. why live. i dont do anything at all everyday except stare at the four walls. ive had my ex leave me, abort my child after i begged her not to and left me. i have dealt with enough. i have tried most of my life only to be alone for the rest of my life. im tired of the meds the therapists the hospitals the psychologists. im so tired. this. im always going to be alone no matter how hard i try not to. this will always be the case for me. if you are reading this i hope you find peace because peace doesnt exist for me. please dont cry for someone like me. im just words on your screen nothing more. once you log off and shut down your computer i wont exist.