When there is no one, coping is difficult...

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lymeinside

Well-Known Member
#1
How do you deal with life when you have absolutely no one? Absolutely no support system whatsoever. No one that you can talk to. When you are forced to keep everything bottled up inside, your feelings, emotions, depression... everything. When you would do anything to have someone that actually cares about you and wants to listen to you.

I don't know how much longer I can deal with it.
 

Jenny

Staff Alumni
#2
Hi

I'm sorry that you're feeling isolated with how you're feeling and what you're going through.. It's understandable that this is so difficult to cope with when you do not have anyone to share your life with.

Is there anything you can do 'in real life' to maybe get new friends and a support network in your life? I started a course in Counselling Skills in September, and have found that the people on the course are very caring and supportive. Joining a course such as Counselling Skills is more likely to attract caring, supportve people as opposed to maybe.. kick boxing..

Do you see a counsellor or anyone? Maybe that could help too? I started seeing a therapist in September also.. and although some of the sessions are very tough, it's good to know that I have one hour a week where i can just focus on me and know i won't be judged

I hope this forum does help somewhat, in giving you a safe place where you can express your feelings and know that you're not alone.

:hug:
 

bumper

Well-Known Member
#3
I'm in the same situation. For a while I honestly thought that therapy could help me. So I gave it a shot and went for a while. In some ways it helped, but in the long run it only made things worse.

There is no cure for loneliness. And talking to a therapist only makes you feel even more lonely. For me, it just emphasized the fact that I really have no one. Nothing.
 

lymeinside

Well-Known Member
#5
As sad as it sounds, this forum really is my only outlet. It doesn't seem to be helping as much anymore, though. I need a real person to talk to. There are a number of things preventing that, though. I suffer from social phobia/anxiety which makes it nearly impossible to make new relationships with people. I literally do not know anyone outside of my family.

My family is there, but I can't talk to any of them. They just aren't the kind of people you can talk to about personal things, especially things like suicidal thoughts, feelings of despair, hopelessness, etc. They are not people I would feel comfortable talking to, and even if I did, none of them are able to deal with that kind of thing.

I had a bad episode last night. It hit me pretty hard when I was laying there alone on New Years eve. I had to face the truth: there is no one that is there for me. If I had a gun to my head, other than my family, there would be literally no one I could call to beg them to convince me not to do it. No one knows I exist.

How can anyone cope with life when there is no one? They can't.
 

Jill

Well-Known Member
#6
I know how you feel when there is no one to turn to and no one who can really understand what you are feeling. We are here for you if you want to talk
 

Stylez

Well-Known Member
#7
The way im going to reply to posts is just by reading the post and replying. it takes too much time to read all the replys and ultimatlly trying to revise your response because others already said what you said.

How would i deal with life if i had no support system? simply live each day because living is the key. I have a lot of support but at times as some would agree it still feels i have no "REAL" support system. It seems no one understands you and its better not living.

BUT for me i have 7 days until school starts and thats going to be my goal to acheive in this life. its going to be hard no doubt but simply living is the key to living a successful life. Times change bro. read some books about how in a hundred years from now none of this shit is even going to matter.....
 

Lou

Well-Known Member
#8
When i'm feeling this way and i have no one to talk too, i write down what i'm feeling, it always makes me feel better :)

Or i come on here, and read everyone else's problems and then mine don't seem so big.

I'm always around if you fancy a chat x
 

bipolarkitty

Well-Known Member
#9
I don't have anyone either. I'm married, but my husband just can't handle any more of my stuff, it seems like. So I can't talk to him about anything bothering me. I have absolutely no friends. I've lived where I am for 13 years and have never been able to make a friend.

The only one I could kind of talk to was my mom, but now she's gone.

The only support I have left is my therapist. It's just not enough.:sad:
 

lymeinside

Well-Known Member
#10
Well... I kind of expected this. Not many people can relate to such a sorry case.

Haven't you ever had a bad day, and wanted to talk to someone about it? I bet you felt a lot better afterwards. I can't do that. There is no one there for me in that way.

I can't cope with everything by myself. I vent online, but it doesn't help anymore. It's just bottling up and there is no release. I don't know how I got myself into such a rut. I hate myself for this. It is entirely my fault. I let it slip this far down the hole. I have NEVER had a close relationship with anyone. I don't remember the last time I had a friend, and I have never had someone I could call a "best friend". I have nobody. Social phobia robbed me of these things.

I don't smoke, drink, harm myself, do drugs, take medication, or anything. I can't talk to anyone about it. How else can one cope with depression and suicidal feelings? I see no answer. The pressure just keeps building.

The pain inside is becoming more than I can cope with. I've tried to rule out suicide as an option. All that leaves me with is a feeling of extreme despair. My entire body is screaming out.

I don't want a therapist anything like that. That will not work for me. I need someone that CARES, not someone that is paid to listen. Forking over hundreds of dollars so some idiot can look down his long nose at me? Not going to help at all.
 

Multiple Man

Well-Known Member
#11
I cant cope with being alone. But ive isolated myself for so long I dont know if I can even be around someone all the time. There are very few things in this world that takes every ounce of passion and energy of life out of you. Loneliness is a absolute miserable way to live.
 

dropmealine

Well-Known Member
#12
lymeinside, i think i feel much like you do. My family are the only people who know i exist. But recently i have realized something. This is my life. I do not belong to them. We do not belong to our families. We need to live our own lives.
(this is going to be quite a rant)
It honesly doesn't matter as much as one might think what our families think because, face it, if they're older chances are they will die before us. Then we'll be even more so completely alone. Thus we need to build relationships with other people and say who cares about family to a certain extent. This is completely necessary. A support network is a necessity. This forum is what I've found so far.

i used to go for walks in the city i lived. i liked that. Recently i realized that i don't do that anymore. it seems that any form of time-planning that I ever had has gone out the window. i have been wasting time more so than ever, almost like a professional time-waster.

As for drinking, drugs, etc. yeah, I've gotten drunk with people who were my drinking friends. no, I don't have them anymore. Sober we had very little if anything. Due to both their problems and mine, i no longer see them, but they are completely gone regardless. i miss getting drunk and would like to have that back. i have gone to bars completely alone, sat there with a beer, or two, and waited for something to happen. Very little ever has. i smoke the occasional cigarette. ocasionally it leads to the random conversation which can be very interesting. But these are what i would call single-serving friends. or maybe I'm just not being social enough. And with a guy i get homophobic(i need to be honest) so in a way i try not to get it going too much. As for drugs, I think I've figured out I'm better off without them. i haven't had much fun on them lately anyway.

On a lighter note, i went out yesterday, new years' day, to a touristy place, but the kind of place that people might go to when they're alone. Yeah. there were quite a few people i noticed there alone too. problem was i didn't really have the courage to talk to any of them. There was one girl sitting there with her computer. i don't know what she was doing. one guy asks me for a light, but he was talking in French and i didn't feel like putting the extra effort in. And then there were tow other girld as i was leaving that i could have talked to, but it's possible that they were with people. So i suppose that opportunity is out there. People can meet people in really random places. And there are a lot of lonely people out there, who would gladly talk to a stranger for at least a few minutes.

Now back to the negative. i've seen a few people from high school recently and now that it's maybe 6 years later, i've been too lazy and don't care to count, I hear all of the amazing things that they have done and i have absolutely nothing. And it pains me to think that these people feel sorry for me. i can't stand it. i literally have nothing in my life and people out there know that. This is one thing that leads me down the anti-social spiral. i don't want people to get to know me too well because soon they'll realize what kind of a loser i really am and either get rid of me completely, as has recently happenned with someone, or get sympathetic, which i can't stand. it makes me feel terrible. That is all i can think of right now.
 

lymeinside

Well-Known Member
#14
I already said that counselling will not help. I need someone that actually cares, not someone that is paid to listen to me.

How the fuck did I go this far wrong...
 
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