What is the point in the crisis team? What will they actually do if you call them? When do you call them? I mean if it was when I felt like self harming, well I'd be on the phone to them all the time. If it was when I was thinking about killing myself then again I would be on the phone to them all the time. The thing is with me I think about these things all the time. When I decide I am going to do something about it I am too stubborn and nothing brings me back from it. So how will the crisis team help. I've got to go back to the A+E on Friday for more checks. They will see new cuts then. So going to have to explain all that. I don't think crisis team will hekp with me. It's taken me since September to be able to start even remotely being honest with nurseman, and even then there is things left out. He is not someone I can see whenever either. He just comes after I have done something stupid. The woman from self harm support (I'll call her Sam as only seems fair to give her a name being as though I talk about her a lot) I find it hard to be honest with her. I come on here and write a blog so I can be honest, I can write what I want and get my thoughts, feelings and fears written down. It helps me make sense of my crazy world. I remain anonymous and no ones perceptions of me will change as you have never met me. You don't know me and you will never meet me. I think about death all the time. It scares me. The thought of dying scares me, and the thought of living scares me. Yet I can't continue like this.