When will it be over?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Shauna Lea, Jan 30, 2007.

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  1. Shauna Lea

    Shauna Lea Staff Alumni

    Everyone keeps telling me that everything im feeling will heal in time, but im sick of giving things time. I dont want to give n e more time. im tired of sitting bac jsut waiting for things to change, i just wish i could do something to make it all work out.
    Things r going a bit better between my ex and i...it feels good but i dont kno if it mind end up being worse. By him showing that he cares, hes giving me hope that we can b together again. And i dont kno if that will happen. i dont want to get that mentallity then end up where i was when we first broke up.
    I have made huge plans for valentines day. Im making him a dvd wit photos and saying thats we like, and its got 'our song' playing in the background. Im also planning to tkae him out to dinner and im taking him to see a live stand up comedian that he likes aswell. I kno he will like and appreciate the present but i guess im hoping that he will change his mind and realise that he doesnt want to b without me. beause at the moment it seems like he is in denial, he wants time apart but he realyl does miss me. I dont kno if this is reality or weather its just my wishful thinking.
    Im scared because ive rested my hopes on valentines day, and if nothing comes of it i dont feel as if i will b able to go on in life. At the moment, the small bit of hope i have for that day is what is keeping me going.
    Im so scared that he will never b mine again! i cant live without him! I need to do soemthing to get him bac. What can i do? :sad:
  2. Shauna Lea

    Shauna Lea Staff Alumni

    Why doesnt n e 1 reply to my posts? What have i done to make people want to ignore me? i need help!
  3. n3rd

    n3rd New Member

    Hello Helpless88 :smile: Okay, the following text states ideas and methods that work well with my screwed up mind. Also expressing my ideas in words never works out well. So I apologize in advance and if something requires clarifying, say so and I'll try my best to fix it:

    With regards to the above quote, I'm not sure if you're referring to your relationship with your ex or not, so I'm going to talk in general terms here okay. If you don't want to wait and depending on your situation, sometimes change can substitute for time. Get a new hair style, make new friends, find new hobbies, take part in community activities, etc. I see this as doing 2 things: 1) It eliminates idle time, thus helps take your mind of whatever is bothering you, and 2) it fools/forces your mind into thinking that you've accepted whats happened and you're now willing to forget the past and move on.

    No kidding. A present, dinner, and a show. He's gonna be one lucky guy, and would be crazy to let you go :smile: Unfortunately I have no experience with such ... human ... relationships *n3rd hugs all his electronics*. The DVD sounds like a great idea and should get your message across to your ex without complications (assuming its done correctly).

    If you haven't talked to him about this in dept yet then I think you should. Not during dinner or the show though, because things might get out of hand and spoil the event. Maybe at the end of the day when it's clear to him how much you love him. Again I'm no expert here.

    Okay, you might not want to pay much thought to this, but this is what works for me. Backup plans. This is something I ALWAYS do. I have a backup plan for pretty much everything. If things don't turn out the way I wanted, I know there always a new road for me to instantly travel, before depression and that seeps in. You don't want to formulate this plan after things go bad, because you might not be in the right state of mind to think clearly. Early is good. This also has a lot to do with the “change” thing I was talking about. Repeat: it's a way of saying, “this part of my life is over, it's time to move on, and I already have a plan to follow”.

    I'm sure things will work out well though. Maybe you're just thinking about it too much, thus fueling anxiety. But if they don't, it's not the end of the world. In time (*duck*), he will be replaced and life will go on.

    Take care okay :smile:
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