where i belong

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Existed, Dec 7, 2007.

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  1. Existed

    Existed Guest

    i dont want to feel anymore. i dont want to exist. one option left in my eyes. one option left. im not worth tears, im not worth love, im not worth compassion. so please don't offer it up. nothing ever good comes. just disappointment, just destruction, just lost hope. thought i had something good and it all came crashing down. it all just came and choked me. made me smile for a second. made me almost feel human but of course me as a person had to get in the way. i feel like slicing too deep. i bought new blades. why not! why the fuck not because in the end im just flesh and bones smashed into the earth. face down. where i belong. where i'll always belong
  2. geolab101

    geolab101 Well-Known Member

    i can totally relate with the feelings of not wanting to exist. i also see only one option. i feel exhausted that i'm not getting better, at least not as quickly as i think i should.

    please don't give up yet, try to exhaust every last option. i know i try to do this as well.

    i'm here if you want to talk more.
  3. incombustible2000

    incombustible2000 Well-Known Member

    yes i also sort of understand, no one can really completely understand anothers nightmare, but somewhat, deppression hurts deep but tell me why you are not worth it, everyone is worth it...... I think why not ???
  4. Beattles

    Beattles Well-Known Member

    wether you are still alive to read this or not, i would like to say i know exactly how you feel mate. a good amount of the times i wish i was just a disembodies spirit, floating through time and in around people invisibly.
    id also like to let you know that, that was really awesome what you said. not because i want to glorify death, but because it sounds real.
  5. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    I think I know who this is...Here if you want to talk, even if it's not who I think it is. Stay safe. :hug:
  6. Existed

    Existed Guest

    no one knows me. no one knows the darkness inside. you think you know a person by the words that they type. YOU DONT. You think you know a person just because you type a few brief words with them in passing. You know nothing.

    I am darkness. I am the epitomy of what darkness is. No hope, no faith..bound to the ground by the chains which I have let be attached to me. I am bound by the chains of the abuse, the hate. I have no faith in God. God does not exist. God does not let his "children" suffer in silence. If he even for one fuckin' second existed he would have saved me years ago.

    Memories faded. Memories forgotten. Memories not real. I'm just a whore, you know? Not worth the love, nor the touch of someone meaningful. Other than a fuck here and a fuck there held down by merciless hands. Just a whore. I don't want to feel anymore. DEAR GOD I HATE YOU!! Just so you know. If you do exist you are a fuckin' joke. Piece of shit!! FUCK YOU!! I'd rather kill myself and rot in hell, then sit in your fuckin' graces.
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