While its nice to have outlets for disputes...

Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by meaningless-vessel, Jul 17, 2014.

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  1. meaningless-vessel

    meaningless-vessel Well-Known Member

    We're all gonna die anyway.

    What's the point in wasting time hanging on to things that are dragging us down? Why not make the most of what we do have against what we don't have?

    Just a couple of questions worth pondering - I moan as much (if not more) as others, but i'm getting to a point where I just think I need to moan less and do more.

    Are there any other questions that are thought provoking about what we can do to instil a bit more of a "want to live" in us?
  2. Hatshepsut

    Hatshepsut Guest

    Instinct to live is rarely in short supply, so I tend to doubt that lack of it is the real bugaboo for people who use this web site. The things that bother people are emotion driven. Unfolding Events, or how events are perceived to evolve, somehow drive a person's affect at a deep level near the core of the person, beyond the range of words.

    :distant: Almost everyone already knows the line of reasoning seen above, plus many more justifications of similar nature. The problem is, knowing the logic of healthy people, who habitually incline toward positive thoughts, doesn't help. I don't know why this is so. But there is good evidence. When talking with those who are thinking about suicide, stating lists of positive life affirmation almost never results in their feeling better. Nor does giving them a list of items they could attend to in order to improve their circumstances. They've heard it all before, throughout their days, but there's a fundamental disconnect.

    In short, knowing that you should feel better doesn't change emotions you are feeling right now, and knowing that you should do things differently doesn't motivate you to change. It's the gap between those famous subjunctives--can, will, should, and the reality of "I don't want to, right now." Or, even worse yet closer to truth, it is that as human beings we really don't have as much power to alter or govern our emotions by force of will as the positive-thinking boosters assume we have.

    :distant: If correction of emotional forces we deem bad were a matter of platitudes, no suicide problem would exist to begin with.

    I realize this is a pessimistic view. It does, however, lead me to believe that simply listening is the best help to offer someone in distress, rather than trying to propose solutions.
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