Whose family would not care about their suicide?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by EmptyLife, Dec 21, 2008.

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  1. EmptyLife

    EmptyLife Well-Known Member

    I've read over and over again about everyone whose family members would be hurt by their suicide. Does anyone have a family that wouldn't care?
    Well, mine wouldn't, and that's not just a dramatic statement. When I was 19, I took an overdose that nearly killed me. I was in ICU for two days. I was then in a psych ward for two months. No one came to visit me, no one even sent a card -- even though my nearest relative was 15-20 minutes away. Even my psychiatrist only came to see me once, claiming she couldn't see me, even though she lived only 2 towns away.
    And, the way I was raised, I thought nothing of this. It never occurred to me that someone should care when I almost died.
    So I spent two months in a hell of a psych ward, with miserable, stupid, dishonest, lazy psych nurses and attendants. They treated me horribly. Even the patients asked why they treated me so badly.
    Here I was, severely depressed, extremely vulnerable.
    That was 25 years ago, and I bitterly regret to this day taking myself to the hospital back then. Even then, at 19, I was a battered old soul, and there has been not one pleasant experience in my life since then. Just a lot of money wasted on worthless medications and doctors.
    Looking back, if there were ever universal messages that no one wanted me alive, it was then.
  2. mourningseraph

    mourningseraph Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry you went through that. :sad: My family wouldn't care at all. I haven't seen or spoken to my parents in 10 years and the only famliy member I talk to in my sister-in-law and I haven't spoken to her in weeks. I always spend Christmas alone since I'm not close to any family. They told me that if I commit suicide that they don't want to be responsible to funeral costs or anything. I have to leave a note for the coroner stating there is no next of kin to notify. Unclaimed bodies are cremated and put in a plastic urn then buried in an unmarked mass grave. So yeah, my family wouldnt even notice, let alone care.
  3. jameslyons

    jameslyons Well-Known Member


    Well, I'd certainly care!

    Family is made up of biological people. Who are sometimes pricks. Stupid, ass face pricks. But family is also made up of people who care about you and emotionally invest in you.

    You matter. And if your biological families don't know that, then they are shit. And shouldn't be considered.

    Please PM me if you want to talk.

  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I agree James. Family does not have to consist of only bloodlines. You have become a part of the SF family and we do care. :hug:
  5. FrostyGrunt

    FrostyGrunt Member

    I wonder if it's the same at psych wards as hospitals that self harmers/suicidal individuals get treated like dirt. Most doctors/nurses in hospitals view treating suicidal patients as a serious miss-allocation of resources and time. However it's more likely that at psych wards the staff seem unsympathetic because after years of caring for the same helpless and sometimes hazardous residents they simply become jaded to their predicaments; to keep from ending up in a padded cell themselves.

    I don't mean to brag, but I believe my family wouldn't be able to help but notice and grieve if I killed myself. For awhile I believed they wouldn't and borderline wished that I would just die, but this I realized was simply a product from an individuals tendency to be self centered and at times of great stress to only look inwards on themselves and their own pain. And even when scrutinizing your own family it can be hard to find genuine concern among them even when there is, because most of the time it also makes them feel uncomfortable to address what they may know about your current condition and choose to shield themselves from it, thus inadvertently isolating you and making it seem as though they don't care.

    At times it can be just as unsettling to a family member to confront a suicidal/depressed person or attempt at getting you to admit how you feel than you opening up and asking for help. Just because someone you know may be in a better emotional state than you doesn't make it any easier for them to insert themselves into your situation, or fully acknowledge it, though this is no fault of yours. What all this gibberish adds up to is that most families do care about your well being, but because they've been impregnated with the idea of suicide as the greatest of all social taboos have never developed any scenarios for coping with a suicidal family member, and therefore are highly hesitant and tense when it comes to the subject which keeps them from acting on their concern.

    My apologies for the giant wall of text. :blink:
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 22, 2008
  6. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    I'm very sorry your biological family does not care about you. So many have been in your situation but they have had non-blood families that have been much better to them than their biological ones ever could treat them.

    I hope that if you haven't, that you will find another family that will care for you because you do deserve to be cared for, to be loved, to be worried over when you are in tough times. There is a family right here and other places as well to be found.
  7. levitated-one

    levitated-one Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry that they're like that..shame on them. I wish human beings are better learners.. I have to admit, we're sometimes such a slow learner in things like these.. how we treat other human beings especially. Many of us are so heartless..even to our own family members.. shame on us..!
  8. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Sorry your family is like that. :hug: It's a tragedy. But just because your blood relatives wouldn't care your friends would, friends in your life and friends on here. Family is more than blood, many of my close friends i would call sisters and brothers, sometimes more so than my blood sisters and brothers, because they've been there for me and care more.
  9. Aaron

    Aaron Well-Known Member

    In my family I'm sure only my mum would care if i hopped on the 'Carousel' :wink:
  10. crookxshanks

    crookxshanks Well-Known Member

    i dont think my family would care that much because they just dont understand and even though ive tried to explain it to them they dont want to listen. even when i was on a psych ward they never came and visited despite living close by, so EmptyLife i know exactly how you feel
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