Whose really in control?

Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by itmahanh, Sep 30, 2010.

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  1. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Being in control..... is it not just our fears being manipulated or redirected (by either oursleves or others)? It seems that fear is what really motivates and controls our lives. We spend our childhood, adolescence and adulthood fearful of our past present and future. Every single human at one time in their life (and unfortunately for some,all their lives) fear even our eventual end. Are we really living our lives or are we actually spending a lifetime just trying to stay one step ahead of our fears? Is our entire existance based on the control that our fears, which we create ourselves or that others create and manipulate, have over us?
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Fear is one of the main factors that seem to have control over who we are how we react Fear it can stop one from thinking clearly stop one from acting in one tract sometimes. Fear of what will be said what will be done fear of loosing the control i want so badly. Fear guilt anger all take that control away from us somehow they seem to have the power to drive us to someone we are not. I hope one day to have the control back with therapy meds i hope i can gain control again i don't know i guess one will have to wait and see.
     
  3. Twinkle ☆ Twinkle

    Twinkle ☆ Twinkle Well-Known Member

    Fear, sometimes does seem to control us, or stop us from doing things. Perhaps we do spend our lifes trying to take a step ahead of our fears, there maybe always be something you fear but once you overcome a fear doesn't it feel good? Can't you finally be set free from the fears and it's control once they're overcome?
     
  4. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    I couldnt say. Me it seems for each fear I think I've overcome it either comes back twice as strong or is replaced with a new one. So how can I say I've overcome them if they keep returning? I find myself at a place in my life where it feels safer,more comfortable and certainly easier just to let them have the control. I've been here before when I was married. It was easier to let the abuse happen then to try and fight it. Now when I look back I see not only did my now ex control me, but so did my fear. And it hasnt changed at all. I honestly think I dont want to have control. My experiences with control is that you have to be able to invoke fear to have control and I am not that kind of person.
     
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I think you have some control in knowing what it is that is controlling you. You have the chose now to let it continue to run your life or to take the power away from it and you do the controlling. I know easier said then done we are so use to being controlled we don't know what it is like to have power it scares us we are not sure of ourselves. Small steps right take some control even over the smallest things then work our way up. over what we wear what we eat take control of who see. little steps them move on to bigger ones once we get use to that feeling of freedom where we are in charge. take care.
     
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