y does amelia (x cousin) get it all and i am left with nothing? y does she have a mother and i am left crying for my own? y does she get a man who loves her and children and im stuck alone? god if ur so great y the hell are you punishing me like this? i dont think u care i dont think u care about me at all i dont believe in u god ur not real nothing is real anymore screw life all i want is my mom back and yet thats never gonna happen y am i even here if all ur gonna do is torture my already guilty, pain filled heart, mind, and soul?